tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18373963663369367072024-03-13T05:11:18.655-05:00tlitha qumSara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.comBlogger140125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-88494156177320271412014-02-03T22:18:00.002-06:002014-02-03T22:49:28.966-06:00The Woman Behind the Veil<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">It was a busy day, and I was in a restless mood, tired from
lack of sleep and worried about everything on my plate. My son was, thankfully,
healthy for this doctor’s visit, and I felt God nudging me to pray for all the
other children in the waiting room who were sick, and for the mothers who I
knew were just as tired as me. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Another mother, with 4 children, walked in. Her skin was
dark and beautiful. She wore a completely black outfit with a head covering and
a veil over her entire face, except for her eyes. Those eyes. The weight of the
world seemed to shine in them. That and love for her children.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I immediately watched women all around me tense up. I
watched mothers grab their babies like their lives depended on it. I watched
looks cross faces as though they had just sucked a whole lemon or lime. I watched
a few mothers move to the other side of the room, attempting to be discreet but
not hiding their distaste at the same time. I stayed where I was, holding my
little man and thinking about life and this family that just came through the
doors.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Years ago, I would have been one of those women. The one
with the fear. The one with the dirty scowl on my face. The one who sat on the
other side of the room. But I’m not that woman anymore.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I smiled as the mother came near. She sat down not far from
me, as her precious children grabbed some books and toys scattered around the
room. My son wanted to get down to play as well. He had a book we were already
flipping through. The 2-ish girl wanted it, so I gently took it from my son and
handed it to her. I smiled again at the mother. I noticed her body relax. The
worry lines around her eyes decrease. As if she had been waiting for me to say
something or do something else.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">“They are beautiful,” I said to her, nodding to her babies.
She smiled. I couldn't see her mouth. But I could see the smile in her eyes.
She nodded, and quietly played with her newborn on her lap.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I remember a time when I would have done the opposite. When
my faith would have prompted me to immediately judge. When the first thought
running through my mind would have been one of disdain or self-righteous
consolation.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">I don’t know what it is about having my son that has taught
me about God’s grace in such a life-changing way. It is probably a combination
of things. More than likely me realizing that so much of my previous faith-life
was shallow and built on more of my own thoughts about things rather than His.
I have learned a lot of lessons through the difficult times I have had with my
son. How to really love others was one of them. The Holy Spirit has changed so
much of my thinking. I was never really legalistic. But I was still too much of
a Christian snob.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">You see, like the woman at the doctor’s office, I too wore a
veil. Except mine was a false identity, a person I hid behind to make others
think I was good. My veil of perfection. My veil of holiness. Nothing more than
a mask to cover up my own brokenness that the rest of the Christian world
should never, ever see.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Why is it so hard for us Christians to
exemplify both Truth and Grace? After all, this is who Christ was. The fullness
of God in a man was the very perfect demonstration of Truth and Grace. This was
how he treated those He came in contact with, every single time. He never looked
down on anyone, always loving those who were unloved. He never shied away from
the Truth, always teaching those who missed the mark.</span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Instead, we who are followers of Christ usually pick one or
the other. We think we have to judge others in order to maintain our standards.
We think we have to pretend there is no such thing as sin in order to love
others. Our churches and our preachers focus on one or the other. Why can’t we
be both Truth and Grace? It is possible, because Christ was both, is both. </span></div>
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<span style="background: white;"><span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">We can hold to a standard of
Truth without judging. We can love and give Grace completely without
compromising. When a Christian learns to do this, he sets the world on fire.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="background: white;"><span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">We can look at a mother who
comes from a different background and truly care for her despite what her
beliefs are. We can speak to a person of a different sexual orientation without
thinking in the back of our mind they are going to hell. We can live our lives
based on Truth while showing others His love. We can fight against a sin-wrecked
world without making others feel they are worthless because they aren't
Christians.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="background: white;"><span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">The key in all of this is
knowing Christ and allowing His sweet Spirit to fill us. Those Christians I
know who are reaching others and are making the greatest impact are those who
have been able to master this delicate balance. Christians who speak Love with
every breath they take, and whose lifestyle models a Savior who was pure,
humble, and soaked in integrity and honor. That is the kind of Christian I want
to be – an image bearer of the one true God, taking off the veil of falseness
and instead shining the light of Truth and Grace. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-33360610582639921602013-11-09T17:23:00.001-06:002014-01-16T15:49:36.596-06:00The One Thing We All Have in Common<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I never have a chance to blog anymore, and it makes me sad sometimes. But then I remember why I don't, and then I'm not so sad. It usually has to do with a little someone who takes up all of my time. :) I have a really good excuse as to why I never get on here! I'd rather close the computer and hang out with him!<!--3--><!--3--></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Anyway, lately I've been trying to avoid the internet, particularly FB, as much as I can. It just seems to leave a bad taste in my mouth most of the time. Plus I'm on an anti-drama crusade, in my own life and the lives of others. I don't know what it is, but everything I read seems to be one person justifying their beliefs, their views, their opinions, their lifestyle, their habits, their choices, against everyone else's. I know because I do it. It's like a poison...you allow a little bit of something to get under your skin, and soon you're acting like everyone else. I want to be different!</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Our lens is skewed because we only see people the way they
portray themselves online. Chances are, some of you who know me in real
life like me a lot more in person than you do online. Chances are, some
of you who have never met me in real life, wouldn't like me half as much
as you do online. I try to be me, but often no matter what I say, I rub
someone the wrong way without me even trying. It is frustrating. </span></span><span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">One thing that really bothers me is how many blog posts and articles I read about one particular type of Christian knocking down other particular types of Christians. Now, I agree that not everyone who says they are a Christian really is one, but who the heck are we to judge? Especially if we've never spent one waking moment in the presence of that person...we have no idea what their day-to-day life looks like. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The other day I was thinking about this, and thinking about how the Bible says we are to be peace-makers (see the Beatitudes, book of Matthew). Not just peace-lovers or peace-likers, but peace-makers. That is hard to do most of the time, given the culture we live in. Everybody has something against everybody. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">And I was thinking about what we all have in common as Christians. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The one thing we all have in common? We need Jesus. Desperately. We are a messed-up, broken, judgemental, selfish, sinning (whether we pretend we are perfectly good or not) group of people . Every single one of us. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The Bible says that if we claim not to sin, we are liars. No, that doesn't mean before we become Christians. It means even now. Anyone who acts better than anyone, who claims to not fall short or looks down on others, is a LIAR. Ouch. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">We need Christ every single day. We need His love, His truth, His grace, His mercy, His light, to penetrate our hearts and our minds every minute, every hour. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I'll tell you, I have met some pretty puffed-up Christians, and I used to be one of them. I was real good at making people think I loved Jesus, which was true. I did love Jesus. Then I had my son and went through a very, very difficult time. I almost decided to give up my faith. I cannot blame it on someone else, either. It was me, despite the no-good, horrible things some Christians said about me or to me. The truth was, I, me, myself was the problem. I didn't want to admit that. I wanted to throw the blame on everyone else who had "wronged" me. But my own sin, my own depression, my own anger, bitterness, cynicism, etc, were what had brought me so far from God. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">It took me realizing my own brokenness, my own lack of perfection, to really bring me to my knees and make me get real with Jesus. I was so, so sick of trying to convince the world and convince God that I was fine. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">It wasn't until I realized the weight of my own sin, my own desperate need for Christ, that I stopped trying to justify myself in front of everyone else. And that was when my heart was made whole, and my faith became more than just a nice feeling or sentiment for God.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I think that this, more than anything, is what all of us Christians need. To stop pretending. To stop faking it. To stop trying to look like the "best" Christian out there. To stop writing blogs about how great we are, while trying to proclaim how great God is and using our own "awesomeness" to show people why He's great, and why we're right and everyone else is wrong. I'm a seminary graduate, with a Masters in Christian Discipleship/Education, and I still don't have all the answers!</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">Every single day, we fail. We struggle. We give in to temptation that we pretend we didn't. We watch crap on t.v. we shouldn't watch. We say things we shouldn't say. And if we go around acting like we haven't done anything wrong, we're lying! </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">The one thing we all have in common is that we NEED Jesus. Not just a one-time, "I got saved" type of faith. But the power of the Holy Spirit in our lives at every waking moment. That is what we need. </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">I pray for each person who reads this, that you would get real with God. No more sweet-talking. No more "winning" the comment battle on FB. No more "look at me, I've got it together and you don't" stuff. Just go to Jesus. Run to Him, get on your knees, and get it out. Let Him transform you into who He wants you to be, not the person you are trying to portray to the rest of the world. The best news is, that is all He wants. He just wants your heart, and He will love you without holding back. <!--3--><!--3--></span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #b45f06; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Georgia,"Times New Roman",serif;">God bless you. </span></span><br />
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Rqfe5Xw9_8g/Un7DiS6JtxI/AAAAAAAABAI/QYya2ktpD3E/s1600/mysteryofgrace.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Rqfe5Xw9_8g/Un7DiS6JtxI/AAAAAAAABAI/QYya2ktpD3E/s400/mysteryofgrace.jpg" height="400" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-6559345162099969932013-08-21T14:45:00.003-05:002013-08-21T14:52:40.945-05:00budget-friendly birthdays!<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">Growing up, my Mom always had awesome birthday parties for
us, and she knew how to throw a great party! I always said I wanted to do the
same for my kids one day, although over the years, depending on financial
status not every birthday was as big or elaborate. I think the main thing she
taught me, however, was that you can do something awesome for really cheap. I
learned from her how to do the same, and today I thought I’d share some of
those great tips with you. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>Set a Budget – This is the most important thing.
Whatever you do, do not go over the budget amount (I made this mistake with my
child’s 1<span style="font-size: small;"><sup>st</sup> birthday – we paid for it later by eating soup and
crackers for a while, haha). Make sure to include everything under the budget,
from favor bags to decorations, from food to your child’s gift.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>Pick an Easy Theme – This takes some time and
planning. I suggest picking one as far in advance as you can. Find out what
your child likes, and offer many different options. If your child is very little, you can pick the theme yourself. Also, visit stores and see
what is available (see #3). </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span> </div>
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</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">3)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>2 Words: Dollar Stores – Never, ever, ever pay
full price for something! You can even go to the dollar store and pick your
theme based off of what you find (which is what I did for my son’s 1<span style="font-size: small;"><sup>st</sup>
birthday party)! Dollar Tree, Big Lots, and Michaels are my favorite places to
go. Scour the dollar aisles and wait for things to go on sale. Again, do NOT
pay full price for anything. One example: this year’s favor includes a shovel
and pail for each child who comes. I got them for $0.50 each by waiting until
they went on sale (normally they were $1.50 each!)<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">4)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>Shop All Year – It is amazing how much you can
do if you only spend $10 a month, vs. $100 at one time. I am a planner by
nature, so this one comes easier for me. But even if you are not a planner, write
yourself a note every month to do it. Even if you only shop 6 months in advance,
you will get good deals. I also go to garage sales, consignment shops, and
Goodwill. Nobody will know if you got the cake topper used – if it looks cute,
great! <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<o:p><span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">5)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>Use What You Have – If you pick a theme based on
something your child already likes, chances are you already have a lot of
things at home you can use. Does your little boy like dinosaurs? If he has lots
of dinosaur stuff, clean it up and use it for cake decorations and table décor!
Does your daughter like princesses? Use dress up clothes for décor (like a
crown for the cake topper). I did this for my son’s 2<span style="font-size: small;"><sup>nd</sup> birthday
party with all of my old high-school bedroom stuff in the attic (my bedroom
back then was an ocean theme). <o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
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</span><br />
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<o:p><span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">6)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> M</span></span></span>ake It Yourself – If you are not a crafty
person, enlist the help of a friend who is. If your baking skills stink, order
the cake from somewhere inexpensive but make the rest of the food days ahead
(most things freeze!). Keep it simple and work on it slowly when you have time,
like after the kids go to sleep. <span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span></span><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">7)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>Don’t Go To an Expensive Place – If you don’t
have room at your house for a party, ask someone else (friend or relative) if you can have the party
at theirs. Check out parks and recreation complexes in your area; they will
usually be very cheap and kid-friendly. Places like Chucky Cheese and the
Bowling Alley will eat up your money (and tokens!) faster than you can sing
Happy Birthday! AND, stay away from anywhere that offers to do the party for
you – they will buy stuff from Dollar Tree and charge you 3 times the amount just
so you don’t have to do the work! </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">So there ya go! It's only my little guy's 3rd birthday this year, but just in the last few years I have made many mistakes with parties. Most of all, relax and have fun! If it is too stressful, it's not worth it. YAY for birthdays!!! :)</span></div>
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Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-42861600271189914082013-07-13T00:21:00.002-05:002013-07-13T11:52:54.762-05:00child-like faith...<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I think I am truly learning who God is through my son.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Sorry it’s been so long since I’ve posted, but I am up late
and can’t stop thanking God for the miracle my child is, and for the miracle He
is doing in our lives.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I feel like there is a huge battle going on right now, and I
can sense it. A spiritual battle. Not just for my child, but for all the kids
out there. A war is waging on their souls...but I believe God wins.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
Satan has been throwing every arrow he possibly can at our
family, it seems…but I know God is fighting, and I will fight. <o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I believe God is going to use Stephen for His Kingdom. I
felt it when I was pregnant with him, and now I am feeling it again. His
special needs and all of that are not going to stop him…stop God and what He is
doing.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
Tonight Stephen wanted to pray. We usually pray together
every day, sometimes more than once a day, but almost always at night before he
goes to sleep, while he is lying in my arms or his Daddy’s. But tonight he
seemed to really want to pray. He was so precious I have tears just thinking
about it. <o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I asked him what he wanted to pray to Jesus about.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
He said, without hesitating, “everyone.”<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Now I have to clarify…we have never taught him to say that.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Here’s a kid, almost 3 years old, who is autistic. He daily
injures himself. He often throws major fits and has meltdowns just from going
from one place to another. He cannot go down a slide by himself still. I can’t
get him to take more than a bite or 2 of something most days, even if he has
gone 5-6 hours without eating a thing (before being tube-fed).<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
And something like that comes out of his mouth, out of the
blue.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I have chills writing this, ya’ll.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I cannot even begin to imagine what the Lord has in store
for him. It is something big, powerful, and the Presence of God is just all
over this thing.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
It’s not rare for us to have God moments in our house,
although some days are especially difficult and I am tired and I only have the
strength to pray because God gives it to me and I am desperate for His peace.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">But as crazy as it sounds, I feel like my faith was a lot shallower
before I had Stephen…before we went through all of this hard stuff. Maybe from
the outside, it wasn’t. But oh, on the inside, I was more of a Christian snob
than a real follower of Christ. I really thought I knew God. Even through seminary. Even through mission
trips. It’s like, there wasn’t the depth that exists now. I have a long way to
go.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I cannot brag, so I hope I don’t sound braggy. I often feel
like a mess, like a failure, like a disaster…can I be honest? Like I’m the
reason Stephen struggles with so many things…<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">But somehow, through it all, I am seeing incredible glimpses of
God’s beauty, and I am one thousand times more aware of His Grace, His love, His
strength, His joy, His Truth…all of it. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
It’s kind of where the rubber has met the road. Where during
the midst of the heartache and the absolute exhaustion and the feelings of
hopelessness, I have had to CHOOSE on purpose to trust God and seek Him and
follow Him no matter where it takes me. <o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">It is hard. I don’t always know what I am doing as Stephen’s
Mom. I just beg God to show me what to do. I beg Him to help me find ways to
help him, to bring some sort of healing to his little body. And God is
speaking. I hear His voice more clearly now, I think, than I ever did.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
It is funny how children will do that to you, no matter
whether your child is “typical” or not. The Bible says that “From the lips of
children and infants You have ordained praise” (Psalm 8:2). Did you know that
the word for “praise” in that verse also means the same as “strength?” Maybe that is why Jesus puts such an emphasis on child-like faith.</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Amazing. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
All I can do is follow. Follow my beautiful little boy’s
example. Follow Jesus down a road that is sometimes dry and rocky and downright
terrifying. <o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I am humbled. Thankful. Blessed.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<o:p><span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span></o:p><span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-wv_NM4OfJyc/UeGFz2A_oFI/AAAAAAAAA9k/9GXnkXxLGk0/s1600/praisechild.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-wv_NM4OfJyc/UeGFz2A_oFI/AAAAAAAAA9k/9GXnkXxLGk0/s1600/praisechild.jpg" /></a></div>
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Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-40489008237370216052013-05-26T18:26:00.003-05:002013-05-26T18:26:54.238-05:00answers...<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">DH and I been kind of quiet about this and have waited to post, as we are still trying to process/accept the information we’ve been given. But we are ready now to share with others.</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">Last week we found out the results from all of Stephen’s testing and evaluations, starting 6 months ago when we had our first screening at the Pediatrician’s office, up until now with the team at LSUS. They have confirmed that he has Autism Spectrum Disorder – High-Functioning (also known as Aspergers). He is on the highest end of the spectrum because of his intelligence level (he is brilliant!) and his ability to talk in phrases/short sentences. The fact that he is so high-functioning is really good news to us, as we will be able to help him overcome a lot of the issues he is having. He will start special school this fall and be in a classroom designed for kids just like him!</span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span> </span><span><span> </span></span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">This diagnosis explains almost everything we have been dealing with for the past 1 ½ - 2 years or so, including some of the feeding problems, with Stephen. We still have to go to the Neurologist in Dallas, as well as have genetic testing done. We do know that there is some genetic pre-disposition for ASD in our family. <span> </span></span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">I know so many people are wondering what this really means for us and would like to understand, so below I have taken the time to type/copy what our information packet told us about it! PLEASE read it and share if you would like to. :)</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span><u>*What is Autism Spectr</u></span></span></span><span><span><span><u>um Disorder (ASD)</u></span></span><span><u>?</u> </span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">ASD is a complex neurological, developmental disorder that is made up of several symptoms clustered together. It is called a Spectrum disorder because there are varying degrees of ASD which fall on a line, going from the most severe cases to the most high-functioning cases. In the most severe cases, children with Autism will have a much harder time learning, developing, and living a “normal” life. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span> </span><span><span> </span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"><span>There is no one specific cause of an ASD, although there are currently many theories. There are 5 main disorders, sometimes called pervasive developmental disorders, which fall under the category of Autism Spectrum Disorders: <span> </span></span><span>1) Autistic disorder (classic autism), 2) Asperger’s syndrome, 3) Pervasive developmental disorder, not otherwise specified, 4) Rett’s syndrome, and 5) Childhood disintegrative disorder. </span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">From one autistic child to the next, there will be more differences than things in common. However, when diagnosing an ASD, there are 3 major points (think of a triangle) that specialists and doctors look at:</span></span></span><br />
<span><span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>1)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>Impaired Language and Communication Skills</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>2)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>Social Interaction and Relational Difficulties</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>3)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>Repetitive and Unusual Behaviors</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">For each child with ASD, one of these 3 aspects can be greater than another and the types of problems or difficulties under each category can be different. There is a saying that goes “If you have met a child with Autism, you have met *one* child with Autism.” Yet all 3 points of the triangle must exist for the child to have a true ASD. </span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">There are many children with more moderate to severe ASD who are non-verbal and have a very difficult time speaking or learning to speak. Most people think that all children with ASD are non-verbal. However, a child with a higher-functioning ASD may have a good vocabulary, but poor expressive communication and difficulty in reading body language or facial expressions. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span> </span><span><span> </span></span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">It is believed that children with ASD are violent, unloving or unable to feel. This is untrue; children with ASD may want to be around other people and enjoy their company, but not always know the proper way of interacting or relating to them. There are children with more severe ASD who are withdrawn and do like to keep to themselves, but this stems from having a hard time relating or knowing what to do/say, not from selfishness or meanness. ASD does not disable a child from being able to feel emotions or give emotion – it just may look different because it is harder to process. It can also affect how they feel pain or bodily functions. For example, an ASD child may not be able to understand the feeling of using the bathroom on their self. </span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">Children with ASD exhibit unusual, rigid, or repetitive behaviors. While all children have their own normal behaviors, children with ASD have behaviors that are abnormal in nature. Some of these behaviors can stem from frustration, anxiety, and inability to express a desire. Some of these behaviors can be similar to OCD tendencies, such as slowly lining up toys in a row rather than playing with them. Other behaviors can be somewhat destructive, and a lot of times these children are more harmful to themselves than to others (like self-injury).</span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span> </span><span><span> </span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"><span>There are other defining qualities and medical issues besides the 3 points above that the majority of children with ASD have.<span> </span></span><span>A child with ASD may have all of these, or only a few. Some of these include Sensory Integration/Processing problems/disorder, restlessness and trouble sleeping, gastrointestinal disorders, seizures (epileptic or absence/silent), learning difficulties, lack of self-awareness, difficulties with gross motor and fine motor skills, late onset or lack of developmental milestones, and difficulty completing </span><span><span> </span></span><span>everyday tasks (such as dressing, feeding, etc…)</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">Children with ASD do extremely well with intense therapy, appropriate help and guidance, structure and routine, and many other types of intervention. While there is no known cure for Autism, children can overcome some of the difficulties over time, and there is research on various elements for treating it. Early intervention is highly beneficial for kids with ASD.</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;"><u>*What Autism is NOT</u></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span> </span><span><span> </span></span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">There are a lot of misconceptions about ASD. Autism is not a form of mental retardation, a result of bad parenting, a lack of intellect (stupidity) in the parents’ genes, or the child being “weird” or “evil.” </span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;">Some more myths about Autism are:</span></span></span><br />
<span><span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>1)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>“Autism is not real and is just a trendy diagnosis for kids who are not disciplined.”</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>2)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>“People with autism should be institutionalized and cannot function in society.”</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>3)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>“Kids with autism are not happy.”</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>4)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>“Kids with autism should not be around other kids.”</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>5)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>“Kids with autism grow up to be mass murderers and maniacs.”</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>6)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>“The main sign of autism is lack of eye contact.”</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>7)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>“That child can’t have autism because he/she is too smart.”</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>8)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>“People with autism are anti-social and don’t want friends.”</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span><span><span>9)</span><span> </span></span></span><span><span>“Children with autism will just grow out of it.”</span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span> </span><span><span>There is much information out there about Autism, and not all of it is true. Don’t believe everything you read or hear; talk to a parent of a child with ASD, and don’t isolate them because you think their child is too different. Invite them to do things with your family even if you are unsure how their child will handle it. ASD children need to be loved and accepted; families of children with ASD also need support and acceptance. </span></span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span><span style="color: #b45f06;"> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span> </span><span><span>More for friends and family:</span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span> </span><span><span><a href="http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.autism.com%2Findex.php%2Funderstanding_family_friends&h=vAQFm_8Dc&s=1" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">http://www.autism.com/index.php/understanding_family_friends</a></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="color: #b45f06;"><span> </span><span><span>*All factual information compiled from the American Academy of Pediatrics, AutismSpeaks.org, The Autism Research Institute, and the Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry</span></span></span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-14784384947505018502013-02-01T23:29:00.000-06:002013-02-02T08:52:55.784-06:0030 things about me...<div style="text-align: left;">
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">My sweet friend Kathryn at </span><a href="http://www.singingthroughtherain.net/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Singing Through the Rain</span></a><span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"> did an awesome post for her 26th birthday not long ago, and I loved it! She shared 26 random facts about herself. So I decided to do one for my birthday too. It's my second 29th birthday so it is super special, haha. ;)</span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Anyway, here are my t.h.i.r.t.y. (*cough cough, that hurts) random facts about me! Many of you already know a lot of these, but for those of you who don't, enjoy! :)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">1)<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span></span>I was born in Kalamazoo, Michigan (believe it or not, it is a real place)! <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">2)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> I l</span></span></span>ove anything to do with Ireland, Scotland, and Celtic stuff, esp. Celtic music!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">3)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I am kind of obsessed with coral reefs, the ocean, and scuba diving (though I’ve only been a few times)! My little boy has taken after me with the "feesh" thing. :)</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">4)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I am a former All-Star dancer. I won tons of awards, and my best performances were in hip hop and break-dance style (for real yo!).<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">5)<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span></span>I love to go fishing!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">6)<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span></span>I am a recovering Grammar-Nazi. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">7)<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> I</span></span></span> LOVE fried oysters!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">8)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I do not like flying on airplanes (it’s gotten better over the years though).<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">9)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>My hair used to be stick straight, super thin, and very blonde. It is now curly, frizzy, and dark blonde-brownish, thanks to pregnancy hormones!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">10)<span style="font-family: Times New Roman;"> </span></span></span>Frogs are my favorite animal. I was nuts about them as a kid (still am). <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">11)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I speak Spanish…though I’m not as fluent as I used to be!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">12)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I really love to watch movies. My favorite movie of all time is Ever After…my wedding dress was even designed from and inspired by it!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">13)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>The whole vampire/zombie thing drives me absolutely bonkers. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">14)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> I</span></span></span> have read every single C.S. Lewis book. Most of them, more than once.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">15)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I have a phobia of dirt. I can’t stand it, esp. if it’s on my floors.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">16)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I am extremely pro-life. I don't always talk about it, but I hate abortion with a passion.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">17)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I do not like my teeth.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">18)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I have high hopes of becoming a really great seamstress. But put me in front of a sewing machine and I can’t remember anything.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">19)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> I</span></span></span> was awesome at organization while I was a teacher. At home, not so much.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">20)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I switched high schools in the middle of my junior year, by my own choice. I do not regret it!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">21)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>My “signature” perfume is Jennifer Aniston. It smells heavenly!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">22)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>My favorite Disney character is Dopey, one of the seven dwarves from Snow White. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">23)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I <em>really</em> miss my little boy being a baby.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">24)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>My wedding rings belonged to my great-grandmother. They also happen to come from the royal family in England (not kidding…ask me to tell you the story sometime).<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">25)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I love children’s consignment stores!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">27)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I love Veggie Tales just as much as my little boy does! My favorite one is <em>Lord of the Beans</em>. Hilarious!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">28)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>I do not like scary movies or horror movies. <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt 0.5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-align: left; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">29)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>One of my uncles was a defense coach for the Miami Dolphins!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt 0.5in; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-align: left; text-indent: -0.25in;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="mso-bidi-font-family: Calibri; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-latin;"><span style="mso-list: Ignore;">30)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman"; font-size-adjust: none; font-stretch: normal; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: normal;"> </span></span></span>My least favorite chore is doing the dishes (but I like it better than I used to)!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-86789809975177285762013-01-15T12:34:00.002-06:002013-01-15T23:06:51.111-06:00sunbeams...<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I wrote this poem very late last night and thought I would share. I used to write poetry all the time, mostly in college and in seminary. Now when I get the urge or am inspired I occasionally write. Hope you like!</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"><span style="font-size: large;">“Sunbeams”</span> </span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">by Sara F.</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">(Dedicated to my son)</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">How can it be that God seems so new?</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Like the very first sunbeams</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">After He created the Light</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">And the oceans found their tide.</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia;"></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Rays of golden warmth invade</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">At the smallest touch of a hand</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Nothing, no nothing, can be said</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">When your own flesh changes you.</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">He smiles and my heart skips a beat</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Fluttering and pounding and wondering</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Pride fills up the whole space</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">And creates an irregular rhythm.</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Looking into those eyes so blue</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">And I see the face of God</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">How can I question anything at all?</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">When all I need is in front of me.</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Laughter fills up these rooms</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">And I think, almost out loud</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Here is a picture of perfect Love</span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">Drowning out fears of the unknown.</span></div>
Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-89868423347761865882012-12-14T12:38:00.002-06:002012-12-14T14:53:04.645-06:00Soul-Stirrings from Stephen: What My Son's Needs Have Taught Me (5 - Battling Jealousy)<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman","serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">This post has been sitting on my desktop as an open
file for me to add to, review, and edit as I need to for weeks. I think I have
been hesitant to post it because it’s a tough one to share. Also, our lives
have been extremely difficult as of late. I can’t say on here, but along with
Stephen’s upcoming Autism testing/evaluation, our family is going through a lot.
My own family, specifically, needs prayer.</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">As you already can see by the title of the post, I
am continuing my Soul-Stirrings from Stephen series, and this is an extremely
honest topic. But once again, God has used my precious little man to convict
me, change me, and open my eyes to see His perspective on everything.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"></span></span></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">In our world, among every color, tribe, and social
status, comparison is rampant, common, and feels completely normal. We are
constantly comparing ourselves to others, comparing what we have, how we look,
how much money we make, how nice our house is, etc… We never look at ourselves
through eyes in the mirror that stare back and say “content” or “good enough;” we
see eyes staring back that view the world through the lens of “don’t have
enough” or “don’t measure up”…eyes that can’t see the truth and define our
identity with lies.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
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<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">It’s a sad fact to say that new Moms, especially,
are constantly comparing themselves to other Moms. And in turn, are being
evaluated by other Moms based on their choices, parenting ideals, and beliefs.
Then, if they do not measure up to whatever standards are set by whoever set
them on her popular Mommy-blog, they feel like horrible, insecure Moms. </span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">Eventually, the insecure feelings can lead to
depression, anger, and bitterness. The worst thing about this is that it spills
over onto our children, and we eventually start thinking there is something wrong
with them as well. This happens to Moms of every type of child there is.</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia;">B</span><span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">ut bring in a Mom who has a child with real special
needs, and it is a whole new ball-game. Along with all of the other common feelings
that a Mom has when she compares herself to another Mom, a Mom of a special
needs child feels something that the exhaustion, anger, insecurity, and
bitterness don’t always reveal. A little secret that, if revealed, might blow
her cover and cause her to avoid other Moms, even her real friends, altogether.
</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">This little secret is called Jealousy. Yep, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">jealousy</i>.</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">Oh I know, the word itself doesn’t sound so bad. But
truthfully, it can eat away at you and destroy your life. Believe me, I <u>know</u>…</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">Jealousy is something no-one talks about anymore
because it is not really seen as one of the “big” issues. I mean, really, when
was the last time <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">your</i> pastor gave a
sermon on jealousy? </span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">But it is an issue, and the Bible has a lot to say
about it. One story stands out in my mind.</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">Jacob and Esau were twin brothers, but Esau was the
first-born son to Isaac and the one who would inherit his birthright and
standing from his father. Jealousy raged between the two brothers, and Jacob,
who was so overcome with jealousy over Esau’s inheritance from Isaac, deceived
his father on his deathbed. Then, when Esau realized that his father had given
his blessing to Jacob instead, he threatened to kill his brother. For many,
many years until they were reconciled, the brothers hated each other because of
the jealousy and hurt that was between them. (see Genesis 25-33)</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; line-height: 115%;">God hates jealousy, because he knows what it does to
us, creating bitterness and hatred in our hearts. To long for something that we
don’t have means we sin by not finding our contentment in Christ alone. 1
Corinthians 3:3 says “<span class="text">You are still worldly. For since there
is jealousy and quarreling among you, are you not worldly? Are you not acting
like mere humans?</span>”</span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">Jealousy has been one of my greatest battles since I
comprehended that there was something different and special about my little boy.</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">When I think about how I compared Stephen to other
children out there, it makes me sick inside. I was so jealous of other Moms,
even my friends, that I sort of stopped spending time with people. Add that to
the list of a thousand reasons I needed to leave Facebook for a while.</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">I am ashamed to say that I thought other women were
more blessed than me because their children didn’t need feeding tubes, didn’t
throw up all the time, were meeting developmental milestones, weren’t sick all
the time, etc… </span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">But then gently, slowly, God showed me the Truth.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
<span style="color: #783f04; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zLiAHLBFDlA/UMtxwydIt2I/AAAAAAAAA7s/SsL5c-qflkI/s1600/jealousy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-zLiAHLBFDlA/UMtxwydIt2I/AAAAAAAAA7s/SsL5c-qflkI/s320/jealousy.jpg" width="231" /></a></div>
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"></span></span></span> </div>
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;"></span></span></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">In my hurt, my anger, my bitterness, I was
completely blind to how incredibly BLESSED I was to be Stephen’s Mommy.</span></span></span><br />
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<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">It didn’t matter if he wasn’t perfect, it didn’t
matter that things were hard, it didn’t matter that I wanted to run away or
stay in my black hole, every-time I looked at my child and felt jealous of
other women who had children that were not facing what he did, I was missing
out on God’s blessings.</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">God showed me through a variety of ways, while
healing my heart, that Stephen is the greatest blessing I’ve ever known. There
is nothing more beautiful than him, my son, and every single little thing he does
is a miracle. </span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="line-height: 115%;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #783f04;">His special needs are no longer fuel for my
jealousy, and I no longer compare him to other children. And because of that,
God has again given me a reason to celebrate and to see Stephen through HIS
eyes, eyes that stare back at me in the mirror and cry tears of joy, of truth,
and of a love that shows Stephen he is a perfect child of God.<o:p></o:p></span></span></span></div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Xk10AOt3boE/UMtxjizqlCI/AAAAAAAAA7k/zKZl4kVUcTs/s1600/comparison.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="318" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Xk10AOt3boE/UMtxjizqlCI/AAAAAAAAA7k/zKZl4kVUcTs/s320/comparison.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-355434857308813762012-10-28T11:36:00.000-05:002012-12-14T13:33:06.656-06:00the A word...<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;">Don't worry, this is not about cussing or swear words! </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;"></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;">It’s been way too long since I have posted anything…life
seems to always get in the way, and when I do get online, it’s just for short
spurts of time during the day rather than long enough to write, edit, post, etc…
on my blog. And then there’s the matter of my sweet little man crawling and
climbing all over me while I try to write, if he is awake. <span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span style="mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">I actually have several blog posts I’ve been working on to
continue my series Soul-Stirrings from Stephen, but I’m posting this one because
honestly, I just need to get it out. And even more so is, since I’m opening
this can of worms, I feel much safer posting it and getting my feelings out here
than anywhere else on the World Wide Web. Those who wish to read it, will, and
those who don’t wish to read it probably won’t take the time to come over here
and read it. I kind of like it that way!</span></div>
<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;">As we’ve known for a long time, Stephen has special needs,
most of those which involve feeding problems and sensory problems. As he’s
gotten older, many things have gotten better. Other things, including some of
the sensory integration/processing problems, and certain behaviors, have either
gotten worse or taken on a new dynamic altogether. <o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">We knew that as he grew and
developed his doctors and therapists would be “keeping an eye out” for anything
else that might put Stephen on the radar for other possible diagnoses and
issues. I’ve only told a handful of people what those other things they are
looking for are, mainly because I don’t want rumors to start (which seems to
happen when I talk to certain people), and I don’t want people to think I’m
exaggerating, making things up, or worse. It saddens me that some would rather
see me in the worst light as Stephen’s Mom, rather than the best.</span><br />
<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia;"></span> </div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;">I am so thankful for Stephen’s therapists who are able to
recognize different behaviors and signs for other problems; they are really
Stephen’s biggest advocates besides me, and they work so hard to show me how to
help him and be the best possible Mom I can be for him. When he was younger,
they constantly encouraged me to stay positive and try not to look at
everything he does as a possible sign of whatever else.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;"> <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;">However, there have been a lot of things lately, within the
last few months really, that have caused all of us to seriously discuss other
possible problems that might be a part of who Stephen is. It is extremely
difficult, at the age he is at now (i.e. “terrible” two’s), to tell whether a
behavior is a temporary, normal behavior that can be corrected or outgrown, or
whether it is a behavior that is something to worry about. I don’t want to go
into detail about the particular behaviors and things I’m referring to, but
many of them are not good and do not fall under the category of “normal.”<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;">I guess now is the time to say what I’ve been avoiding, so
that you understand what in the world I am talking about. <o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;">In the next several months, Stephen will be tested and
evaluated for Autism (the A word), or what his therapists call “atypical autism” because he
has excellent fine motor skills, social skills and eye contact. This means that
if he does have it, he will be somewhere on the spectrum but will not be severe
enough to qualify for typical autism. It will be a long process to determine
whether or not he has it.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;"><o:p></o:p></span></span> </div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;">
To say I am scared is a gross understatement. As many of you
know, I have been having problems with insomnia. Though for a while I was
pretty sure it was habitual, I’m now sure of the real reason why it has
continued off and on. <o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #7f6000;">But at the same time, I have A TON of peace. I know that to
me, it doesn’t matter what’s wrong with him, I will love him for who he is
always. I’ve been praying like I’ve never prayed and spending more time with
God than I have since probably the beginning of my relationship with Christ in
college. It keeps me from so easily succumbing to worry and fear.<o:p></o:p></span></span><br />
<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">
</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #b45f06;"><span style="color: #7f6000;">For those of you who read this, all I can ask for you to do
at this point is to PRAY. If you believe in the God of the Bible at all, please
lift my little boy up to Him. I don’t know what to tell you to ask for, except
for God’s will, whatever that might be, for my Stephen. What I do know is that
he is a child of God, who is loved beyond measure, and that I can trust God to
take of him! I am beyond grateful that God is God and that He
has a plan for my precious little boy, no matter what outcome we have in
the months to come.</span> <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-91407868033540002722012-05-31T15:48:00.003-05:002012-05-31T18:08:03.244-05:00Soul-Stirrings from Stephen: What My Son's Needs Have Taught Me (4 - Finding Joy)<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Once again, it's taken me too long to post this. My original plan was to post a different blog topic, but I felt led to post this one instead. Blessings. :) </span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Lately I’ve been restless, hungry even, when it comes to seeking God and understanding His will for my life. At the same time, I’m also learning to be still, so that I don’t have to try and have everything figured out. As I spend each day with Stephen, taking care of him and his needs, I have come to a place where there is a lot of joy despite things often being hard and overwhelming. God has used things in his life to get me to this place. I can honestly say that joy is found in the midst of suffering. And here is how.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">It’s taken a lot of wrestling with God to get to this point. Some Christians freak out at the thought of “wrestling” with God. They would say “But if you’re saved, you must not trust God because bad things don’t happen to people who love and trust Him.” I do not believe this is true, and I’m certain that those who say this have either 1) never been through something painful or tragic, 2) are living in their own happy bubble, oblivious to the rest of the world, and/or 3) avoid the subject of pain/suffering like the plague and are the first to change the channel when anything bad or sad comes on the news.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I don’t see anywhere in the Scriptures that teaches us to pretend that life is one big, happy, rose-colored walk in the park. In fact, if you read the Bible, you are sure to come across tragedy before you even get through the first book of Genesis. There are numerous accounts of Christians who have wrestled with God, and most of the time that comes from wanting to know “why.” Perhaps the hardest book to read in the Bible, if you live as though Christians/God-followers only experience bad things if they aren’t saved, is the book of Job. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Job was beyond faithful to God. He loved God and trusted Him completely. But Job hadn’t ever really suffered. Satan was convinced that if he did suffer, he would surely turn his back on God. But God knew Job’s heart and allowed things to happen in his life that were horrific, such as Job losing his entire family, his land and animals, etc.… Still, Job remained faithful. Then, Job’s 3 friends came along and tried to figure out why God would let such bad things happen to him. They wanted to say that Job had done something wrong or had not had enough faith, that he must have made a mistake somewhere and was being punished, or that God must not have really loved Job like Job thought. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Finally, God comes along to speak to Job (the longest speech in the Bible given by God), and Job is at the breaking point, ready to turn away from God. God first tells Job that He will deal with his friends later and to listen to Him instead. God does not really answer Job’s questions directly, but He does remind Job of His great works, His majesty, and His power/ strength. Job remembers God’s goodness and turns to Him again, God sees that Job loves Him and trusts Him, and God gives back to Job ten-fold what he lost. God shows Job that regardless of how things seem in the bleakest moments, a God who is wise enough to rule the universe is wise enough to watch over his son Job. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">One of my favorite authors, Philip Yancy, wrote a book called “Where is God When It Hurts.” It is the best book I’ve ever read when it comes to this subject. I believe every Christian needs to read it. He says: “In Job, the portion of the Bible which most vividly poses the question ‘Who causes pain?’ God deliberately sidesteps the issue. He never explained the cause to Job. All the way through, the Bible steers from the issue of cause to the issue of response. Pain and suffering have happened – now what will you do? The great discussers of cause, Jobs three friends, are dismissed with a scowl. The Bible is so clear on this point that I must conclude the real issue before Christians is not ‘Is God responsible’ but ‘How should I react now that this terrible thing has happened?’" </span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Ever since Stephen was born, and things went downhill, I have questioned the cause of what went wrong. Over and over I would ask God the same things and never get an answer. I still do not have an answer. The weird thing is, the more I focused on the cause and demanded answers for what happened, the more bitter and angry I became. It was affecting everything I said and did. Yes, I loved my son more than life itself, but I was not content with God letting something be wrong. And this in turn was affecting how I viewed my son and my reason for living. A whole year went by before I realized that though I had not turned my back on God completely and still loved Him, I was not exactly happy with Him. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The amazing thing about God is that He is patient, He is willing to listen, and He will do whatever it takes to get us out of the pit of despair. He was also willing to let me wrestle with Him until I decided to stop wrestling and start listening to Him. I pretty much got an earful (albeit gentle), but this time I didn’t respond with more questions. My response was different. I was still grieving, and still am, but born out of that grief was a joy and thankfulness I had not had (I wrote more about that in another post, which you can read by clicking <a href="http://tlithaqum.blogspot.com/search/label/grace%20and%20gratitude" target="_blank">here</a>).</span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The Bible says: “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in Christ’s sufferings so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.” (1 Peter 4:12-13)</span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">“In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith – of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire – may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.” (1 Peter 1:6-7)</span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Philip Yancy writes “We are often willing to undergo productive suffering; athletes and pregnant women volunteer to suffer because of what it will produce. The Bible says that a proper Christian response to suffering gives this same hope to the person on the hospital bed. He can become a better person because of his pain.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The rest of the Bible sheds some light on the words ‘rejoice’ and ‘be glad.’ By those words, the apostles did not intend a grin-and-bear-it or act-tough-like-nothing-happened attitude. No trace of those attitudes can be found in Christ’s response to suffering, or in Paul’s. If those attitudes were the goal, self-sufficiency would be the quickest way to attain them, not trust in God. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Nor is there any masochistic hint of enjoying the pain. ‘Rejoicing in suffering’ does not mean Christians should act happy about tragedy and pain when they feel like crying. Such a view distorts honesty and true expression of feelings. Christianity is not phony. The Bibles spotlight is on the end result, the use God can make of suffering in our lives. Before He can produce that result, however, He first needs our commitment of trust in Him, and the process of giving Him that commitment can be described as rejoicing.”</span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">In all of my wrestling, questioning, etc. with God, He finally led me to the realization that I was not trusting Him. It was impossible for me to feel any peace or joy whatsoever without that trust. We trust those we love, and if I loved Him, I had to trust Him. Hope and joy and laughter and the things I now am able to experience daily are born of trusting through suffering, or in my case, trusting while my precious son faces challenges that are beyond what I really understand and beyond the answer to 'why.'</span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I have found joy only by trusting God. The days in which I don’t trust in Him are the days in which I find myself trying to slide back in the pit. Trusting Him is the only way I can look at Stephen’s future with hope and not worry. </span><br />
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<span style="color: #7f6000; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Trust God. No matter what you’re going through, no matter what people say, no matter how angry or bitter or sad you may be, God does have a plan. A good and secure plan. Trust Him.</span><br />
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</div>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-8394638483845365222012-04-13T12:17:00.001-05:002012-04-14T11:10:27.384-05:00Soul-Stirrings from Stephen: What My Son's Needs Have Taught Me (3 - Extending Compassion)<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Back in the olden days when I was in seminary (actually, that wasn’t so long ago, it just feels like it), one of my favorite professors shared a quote with the class that has stuck with me since then. I remember him talking about why he taught the subject he taught, and he said it was because “we teach the best what we need to learn the most.”</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I think for a lot of us, that is true. I always said that to my youth group kids when I was trying to give a sermon, except I changed the word “teach” to the word “preach.” Some of the very things I wanted them to know were things I had struggled with or still struggled with (like dating the wrong guy – past, or trusting God – present).</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">This post is kind of about that. Once again, God has used Stephen to open my eyes a little bit. I don’t want to come off sounding high and mighty, and as my DH has always said, God will use anything to keep us humble when we start thinking too much of ourselves, or when we think about ourselves too much. I know in the past I have offended some people by attempting to say something God wanted me to say, and it came across like I know everything or thought I was better than them. Unfortunately, I don’t know everything, and I definitely don’t think I’m better than others.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I can confess that before I had Stephen, a baby with medical issues/special needs, I rarely, and I mean rarely, thought about parents who had a sick child or a child with special needs. Sure, I would see commercials about St. Jude’s with cancer patients, or hear of a mom and dad grieving over a stillborn baby. I’d see a child with Down syndrome in Target, and I’d think “oh, he/she is so cute.” But truthfully, it bothered me, and most of the time I’d catch myself saying an empty prayer and moving on. If I want to be brutally honest, I’ll just say I really didn’t care.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">This pretty much changed when Stephen was in the hospital for 2 ½ weeks after he ended up dehydrated and refused to eat or drink. We were in the same hallway as children who had a myriad of issues; some were there for a simple surgery and would get to go home. Others were there with chronic illnesses. And still others were tiny babies clinging on to life. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I’ll never forget meeting the teenage mother of a baby who was premature and had a heart defect; this young girl had no idea if her child would make it from one day to the next. The fear and exhaustion on her face were more than I could take. It would be months before they could do a surgery on her child to correct the heart defect because she wasn’t big enough. She had never even held her baby girl. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">After that, when we went to Baylor and stayed at the Ronald McDonald House in Dallas, I met a little boy named Jordan who had been battling cancer for years. I became quick friends with Jordan’s Mom, Vicki, who told me about Jordan and what their family had been through. It was like the ignorant, selfish blinders were gently removed from my face, and then I was hit on the head with a brick. My whole body was screaming at me to “WAKE UP…it’s not about you, it never has been!”</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">When we got home from Dallas, I was still having a <em>really</em> hard time accepting that my child wouldn’t eat and that we didn’t know what was wrong with him. But I also told God that I didn’t want to live with my eyes closed anymore to what other people, specifically sick or special needs kids and parents, were going through. I prayed for Him to give me opportunities to bless people, to reach out and show compassion. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">It wasn’t long until I had that chance. Stephen needed another endoscopy to see why there was blood coming through his feeding tube, and during that time, I met a precious mother whose 17-year old son needed a feeding tube. The doctors didn’t know what was wrong with him, but he had stopped walking, stopped talking, and stopped eating. He had a type of degenerative disease that was unknown. He was next door to Stephen in recovery. Tears just poured down my face as I watched her looking at her son’s new feeding tube they had just put in. I introduced myself and asked her if I could give her a hug and pray for her son. I think she was kind of shocked, but she didn’t hesitate. She was alone, and I think she felt it. While Paul stayed with Stephen, she and I talked. I told her how to use the feeding tube, and I gave her my phone number in case she needed anything. At the same time, there was a young nurse who was sitting at the desk. I walked back by her, and she asked me where I went to church. I told her where we went, and she said that she wanted to be in a church where people really cared about other people. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Not long ago I heard a quote that I love and want to share. It goes like this: "Sympathy says 'I feel sorry for you, but I'm glad it's not me.' Compassion says "My heart hurts for you, and I want to help.'" S</span><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">omehow, in crazy ways, God takes our brokenness and uses it for good. But He can’t do that unless we get our minds off of ourselves and reach out to others. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">There’s a new song out by Anthem Lights that I love; Stephen and I love to listen to it and dance together. I want to share the lyrics because it completely sums up what I’m trying to say in this post, and what I’ve been feeling for quite some time.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">“Outta My Mind” – Anthem Lights</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Feelin’ like I got a front row seat to watch everybody be happy</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Can’t even paint a smile on my face, it’s so hard to not complain</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Gotta try not to say</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">“O God, what about me”</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">‘Cause I know that’s not the way that I’m supposed to be</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Get me outta my mind and into Your heart</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">It’s not about me, it’s not about me</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">So I’m gonna start playin’ my part in Your design</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Now is the time</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Get me outta my mind</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Outta my mind</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">There's a bigger picture on display and it's starting to come in focus</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Causing me to see to see the ones in need outside my little world</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Gotta try, just to say</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">“O God, what can I do”</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Doesn't matter what it takes, I wanna lead them all to You</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Get me outta my mind and into Your heart</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">It’s not about me, it’s not about me</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">So I’m gonna start playin’ my part in Your design</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Now is the time</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Get me outta my mind</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Outta my mind</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">If anybody asks me what have I been up to</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">This is what I'm gonna say</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I've been spending my time, outta my mind</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">And I'm really lovin’ livin’ this way</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Get me outta my mind and into Your heart</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">It’s not about me, it’s not about me</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">So I’m gonna start playin’ my part in Your design</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Now is the time</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Get me outta my mind</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Get me outta my mind</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">So I’m gonna start playin’ my part in Your design</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Now is the time</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Get me outta my mind</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e69138; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Outta my mind </span><br />
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<br />Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-53887758447250442242012-03-28T17:31:00.000-05:002012-03-29T16:46:01.862-05:00Soul-Stirrings from Stephen: What My Son's Needs Have Taught Me (2 - Holding On to Hope)<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">(I apologize for taking so long to get this post up. I had written it awhile back but didn’t have a chance to proof-read and edit until now! We are always busy with something, and unless little man is napping or DH is home, I don’t always get the time). : )</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">God truly speaks to me through my son Stephen. Sometimes even after reading the Bible for over an hour, I feel like I don’t hear Him. Then I see Stephen smile, sleep peacefully, or do something new, and I feel the presence of God in the room. Sometimes when I’m tired or losing my patience, God uses Stephen to remind me of His love through a precious hug or kiss. I feel like things are going to be okay because my child is a beautiful representation of the Hope that Christ can give. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">God also uses others to speak for Him when we are at a loss or when we feel like He is silent. During one difficult week, we struggled to make it to our church’s Bible study for couples. DH and I always try our best to get there even if things are crazy. There have been many times that DH has gone by himself because I had to stay home with a sick or hurting baby. That week, I believe Stephen was well, but DH didn’t get home from work until very late after a stressful day. We almost didn’t go, but we knew we needed to be there for support. We are beyond thankful for such a wonderful group of people that are willing to listen, pray with us, and offer loving support and comfort. Every person in our small group has more grace than anyone I’ve ever met. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">That night we watched a video based off of Psalm 42:5, which says “Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God.” During the discussion, I remember sharing with our group that at the worst time of Stephen being in the hospital, not eating, being sick, I felt utterly hopeless. I felt like God had abandoned me after years of wanting to serve Him. And I didn’t know what went wrong or why. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Everyone in the group offered encouragment towards me, but sometimes it takes a little boldness from a person to really hear God’s voice. One couple leads our group, and they are incredible. It was *Diane, the female leader, who spoke some words I needed to hear. She told me I had to remember that while I may be helpless, I am not hopeless. That I either had to acknowledge God’s goodness regardless of what I was going through, or I could pretend that He didn’t care. That if I trusted Him then I had all the Hope I needed. And that His Hope is enough. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Talk about a blow to the ego. Although she said every word soaked in love, she didn’t sugar coat it. It was exactly what I needed. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">That night, months ago, I decided that I was going to let the Hope of God be enough. And on the days when I have felt exhausted, frustrated, angry, confused, scared, alone, etc… over my son’s medical problems and special needs, when I couldn’t hear God say one word, when I looked at Stephen and wondered “why,” that was when I held on to Hope. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">There are lots of things we can put our hopes in. I can put my hope in Stephen being healed. I can put my hope in financial gain or material things. I can put my hope in my relationship with my husband. I can even put my hope into my own plans and schemes for now and the future. But when those hopes let you down, or things don't go the way you hoped they would, where do you go?</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">You go to the One who is Hope. His name is Jesus Christ. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Real Hope IS enough. When you have nothing left to hold onto and your whole world is falling apart before your eyes, there is Hope. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br /></span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-87644564032944628712012-03-11T18:15:00.006-05:002012-03-15T12:00:22.792-05:00Soul-Stirrings from Stephen: What My Son’s Needs Have Taught Me (1 - Expecting the Unexpected)<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I decided to start a new blog series that I hope touches whoever reads it. I want to say that each of these posts I share come from a very tender part of myself. A part that used to be completely open but is not so much anymore. A lot of me has decided to “sit down and be quiet” since my life was turned upside down by my son Stephen. However, another part of me desires to express what I feel and even more so, what God has taught me through my son’s different needs/medical issues. I believe with all of my heart that God wants me to share. Do I believe that God’s purpose in me being his Mom was for this? To become a better me? To act like I know a bunch of stuff that I didn’t before? <em>No</em>. I think God’s ultimate purpose in me being Stephen’s Mom is to love him and help him grow, specifically to help him grow up in Him. Yet it amazes me each and every day what God does through my child in order for me to grow up in Him. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">It was pretty early on when I realized something was going on with Stephen that wasn’t “right.” In fact, when he screamed bloody murder the first couple of days while I tried to feed him, I was shocked. A baby is supposed to want to nuzzle his mother and enjoy her milk, right? At times, it seemed as though feedings were getting better. Then we would have another screaming episode, and I would be raw and bleeding. After much sought-out advice from others and trying every trick in the book, we moved to bottle-feeding. He hated that even more. It got even worse when he began vomiting, choking, gagging, turning blue, and not sleeping. After that we began seeing doctors, going through tests, trying different medicines, etc., etc… We were told that our son was “the poster child for SIDS” and to keep him upright 24/7. For months my husband and I walked around like zombies. Every waking moment was spent taking care of our son, trying to feed him and make sure he was okay. We finally opted to do a surgery that promised to help. It did, for a little while. Then things got worse when Stephen stopped eating altogether and ended up severely dehydrated and in the hospital. Finally he needed a feeding tube, and we went to Dallas for a feeding program, returning home with little to no improvement. Not long after, we discovered serious sensory integration problems, and certain milestones that Stephen had been doing (like rolling over) suddenly stopped. Developmental progress, specifically physical, was not being made. Since then, my life has consisted of doing therapy every day with him, both in clinic and at home, so that he has every opportunity to function normally.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">When I was pregnant with Stephen, I had NO idea that our lives would be the way they are now. I expected being a new Mom to be glorious, and that I would have a perfect, healthy baby. And really, who doesn’t expect that while carrying a beautiful baby in the womb? It was even more unexpected because my pregnancy was normal. I read many books while pregnant, including "What to Expect When You're Expecting." What the books didn't tell me is that there is always a chance that something can go wrong. And there are many types of special needs that cannot be detected in the womb. Not once did the idea of having a baby with needs or medical problems go through my mind. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I bring up all of this to help make this post a little clearer. Because my life with Stephen, to the outside world, is not normal; but to me, it feels like coming <em>home</em>. Like having Stephen is where I've always belonged. I am sure that doesn’t make much sense. But if you look at things through God’s perspective, it does. I have learned that God’s plans do not make sense. He often gives us the unexpected because it is exactly what we need. And when the unexpected comes along, it is not always something we want. God’s Word says that we may plan our steps, but the Lord directs our path (Proverbs 16:9). Stephen is not the baby I expected or planned for, but he is <em>my</em> baby and that makes him perfect to me. Being his Mama has helped me to expect the unexpected and to not be afraid of it. I have absolutely no idea what the future looks like. Yes, there is that nagging voice that tells me to be afraid of it. But God’s Word also says that we are not to be afraid of the future because He has great plans for us (Jeremiah 29:11). He has incredible plans for my little boy. There is something special about him that goes beyond any type of special needs. And knowing God has Stephen in His hands...that I can expect great things no matter what the future looks like...is at this moment enough for me.</span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-iwyfUb8ZdQA/T15XvPTaEII/AAAAAAAAAzI/7fIqczadbJA/s1600/my+fave.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-iwyfUb8ZdQA/T15XvPTaEII/AAAAAAAAAzI/7fIqczadbJA/s320/my+fave.jpg" width="227" yda="true" /></a></div>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-71587758943644043572011-12-06T15:44:00.006-06:002011-12-06T16:11:16.516-06:00Jonah (minus the whale)...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I know its been awhile since I've updated! Life is as hectic as usual. The crazy weather changes (hot one day, freezing the next) have brought along some yuckiness for my sweet Stephen. He was sick for about 2 1/2 weeks, first with a virus, then a mild ear infection (doctor said he was happy it was the first infection in 3 months, and it wasn't even a bad one...thank you to our chiropractor and to warm garlic oil!), then a feeding tube infection. The tube infection was the worst part because he vomited alot. It hurt for him to be fed so he lost some weight too. 2 rounds of antibiotics later, he is doing much better. Plus he gained back all his weight! </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">We are now doing a partial blenderized diet with him also - meaning he is now taking some real foods blended into his hypoallergenic formula. So far, he has had no reaction to apples, pears, sweet potatoes, regular potatoes, bananas (slight constipation with those), chicken, turkey, peas, spinach, strawberries, broccoli, mango, and oatmeal. Woohoo! This already means that there are plenty of things he CAN eat without a reaction, aside from the milk/soy protein intolerance. I am using either organic packets of baby food or making it myself. I like blending it myself better but since time is often limited, I do buy organic packets of food also. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Finally, Thanksgiving Day was a huge breakthrough for him with eating!!! At dinner that night, he had 15 bites of food by mouth! That is the most he's ever taken. I had to put the food in his mouth for him, and each bite was tiny tiny, but he ate it! We have been rejoicing because he has been doing great each day with trying to eat. I am SO SO SO SO SO SO SO proud of him!!!!!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">A few days ago, a ministry that I follow on Twitter shared a YouTube video that a teen named Jonah made. I have no idea if Jonah was being for real or if it was just a ploy. Even if it was fake, it is a very real example of how many teens today are feeling. They are so lost. Everywhere they go someone is screaming a different message at them. I think this generation of kids and teens are experiencing a true identity crisis (though it has been in past generations also). It's even harder when you are the type of teen who isn't the football star or the homecoming queen. Bullying is at its worst and teen suicide rates have skyrocketed. In my hometown alone, the last 6 months has seen more students take their lives than you can count on 2 hands! The following video of Jonah broke my heart, but I think it needs to be seen by adults who are raising this generation of kids and the next. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I pray that this is something I will never see with my son. It is my deepest hearts cry that God would guide me in raising him to know who he is in Christ, so that he will want to serve Him wholeheartedly and live in His light.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I know I am not a perfect parent, and that Stephen is only 15 months old. But I am seeing way too many adults messing up kids' lives. I have chosen to not be a passive, blind, ignorant parent. There are already influences in Stephen's life that are working to take him out of God's hands, and I am refusing to let them win.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Parents, it's time to step up. Quit sitting around playing on the computer or doing your own adult thing all the time. Get your kids off of the computer and spend time with them. Don't shove your kids out the door or shove them into the next cool sport/club/activity. Get involved in your kids/teens' lives! Teach them the Word of God. LOVE them. Make life worth living in any way that you can, even if its just doing laundry together. Be creative. Get on the floor and interact! Have family dinners, talk about things, play games together and turn off the cell phones and the Playstations! Don't let your kids fall to the wayside because of your own ignorance and passiveness. Go to battle for your childrens' souls! Because whether you believe it or not, Satan is trying to win them over, and he's doing a good job of it.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">"Direct your children onto the <em>right</em> path, and when they are older, they will not leave it." ~ Proverbs 22:6 (New Living Translation, emphasis mine)</span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-49055440467447696252011-10-27T13:31:00.004-05:002011-11-01T11:53:33.439-05:00grace and gratitude...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I’ve been angry for a long time. For about a year to be exact. Angry and sad and scared and broken and confused and frustrated… and angry.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Angry at the unexpected, angry at things unnecessary, angry at broken dreams, angry at God. Angry at people who were supposed to be experts, angry at doctors who lied or didn’t care. Angry at friends and family who made me feel crazy. Angry at Christians for wanting me to get it together. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Angry at not being able to help my son. Angry that I thought God didn’t plan for Christians to have special needs children. Angry at those who seemed to have it so easy with their children. Angry that God had “blessed” others and not our family. Angry at those who gave up on me.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Angry that my child has had to hurt/suffer. Angry that we don’t know what went wrong. Angry that we don’t know how to prevent it from happening again. Angry that I felt God didn’t want me to be a mother.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Just. so. angry.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">A year later, that anger is gone. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">There are days that I am aware of the hurt that still clings to my heart in subtle ways. I still cry, but instead of every day, it is only once or twice a week. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">But the anger has been replaced. I no longer go through almost every day focusing on the “what if’s,” the “why’s,” the “how’s,” the “what happened’s,” the “why me’s” and the “why them’s.”</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">What has replaced the anger? There are 2 things: Grace and gratitude.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The Grace of God. And gratitude, for what He has done and for what we have that could have been taken away.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I no longer look at Stephen and think if only he would/could eat, life would be great. I no longer see the problem. I see beauty, through God’s eyes. I see the gorgeous, beautiful, happy baby boy that I dreamed of when I was pregnant. I no longer see what he isn’t, but what he <em>is</em>. I no longer see what he can’t do, but what he <em>can</em> do. I see a child that is an absolute <em>miracle</em>, who, if but for the Grace of God, might not be here. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">There are 10,000,000 other things that could have gone wrong. There are 10,000,000 other problems/issues he could have. When he was choking and turning blue, he could have died. When he stopped eating and stopped gaining weight, he could have starved. When doctors dismissed him, he could have gotten even more behind developmentally. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">But he didn’t and he’s not, because of God’s Grace. And I am so unbelievably <em>THANKFUL</em>.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The more I get on my knees, the more I read God’s Word, the more I hear God speaking through gracious loving people, the more time I spend in His presence, and the more I focus on giving to others in need, the more I am filled with this gratitude because of His Grace.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I’ve literally felt like I’ve lived in a deep dark hole for months, a hole that was filled with anger, and then desperation from trying to get out myself. By my own stupidity, I wasn’t going to get out of that hole until God decided that I wanted Him to help me get out. He kept offering His hand, kept saying He’d pull me out, but I kept refusing because I had a “right” to be angry. I had fallen, down, down, down, so far down that I didn’t have any more strength to try and get back up.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">But because of God’s Grace, I’m not in that hole anymore. I’m not even on flat ground. I’m slowly trekking up the mountain, and I’m bringing my precious little boy with me. And we are going to get to the top, by the Grace of God. And I am ridiculously full of <em>GRATITUDE</em>. More gratitude than anyone could understand. And there is an overwhelming sense of <em>HOPE</em> that I’ve been given that was wiped out.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">God’s Words says that Jesus never leaves us nor forsakes us (Hebrews 13:5-6). That we can find Hope in Him, Hope that is real (Romans 15:13). That He knows us inside and out and searches our hearts (Psalm 139).</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">God says that we have been bought at a price through Christ’s death (1 Corinthians 7:23), and He knows every hair on our head (Matthew 10:30). That He is the one who gives and takes away (Job 1:21). That He forms life in the womb in every detail (Psalm 139:13), and He has a future and a plan for each of us (Jeremiah 29:11). </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">God’s Word says that we cannot understand all the ways of God as fallible man (Ecclesiastes 11:5), yet He will lead us on a straight path if we put our trust in Him (Proverbs 3:5-6).</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The Lord tells us that we must walk by faith, and not by what we see (2 Corinthians 5:7). He promises us that if we come to Him in prayer, with thanksgiving, He will calm our anxious hearts (Philippians 4:6). And He says that when we can’t comprehend what’s going on, we can still have complete peace (Philippians 4:7). </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Jesus wants for us to realize that if he cares for a tiny sparrow, providing food and shelter, He will care for us 1,000 times more (Matthew 6:26). God tells us to seek Him first, and everything else will somehow come together (Matthew 6:33). He tells us not to worry about tomorrow, to take it one day at a time (Matthew 6:34). </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Jesus said He came so that we could have life that was abundant (John 10:10), and that by His own stripes, there is healing (Isaiah 53:5). He says that what the world considers to be blessings are actually total opposite of His idea of blessings (Matthew 5).</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Jesus said that if we have faith the size of a mustard seed, that we can move (or climb) mountains (Matthew 17:20). That if we just trust Him, TRUST HIM, we can walk on water (Matthew 14) and do great works in His name (John 14:12).</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">My heart is so full these days, because it is full of gratitude for the Grace of God. Even though life is not the same as it used to be and it’s nothing like what others might consider normal, it is a life that God is working on, working in, and working through. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I know I have a long way to go still to get to where I need to be. But, every day that I wake up, I say thank you God, thank you for your Grace, thank you for my sweet Stephen who I know, without You, may not be in my life. Every night when I go to bed, I am thankful, even if the day has been hard or frustrating. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">God keeps pouring out heaps of mercy and Grace on us. We don’t deserve it; I don’t deserve it. But for the first time in a long, long time, I am truly, utterly full of gratitude.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-71033156749495441852011-10-11T22:03:00.009-05:002011-10-12T11:03:22.444-05:00understanding feeding aversions/disorders, part 2...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">(If you have not read part 1 of understanding feeding disorders/aversions, please<span style="color: #20124d;"> </span></span><a href="http://tlithaqum.blogspot.com/2011/07/understanding-feeding-aversiondisorders.html"><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #0b5394; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"><strong>CLICK HERE</strong></span></a><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"> first. If you did get to read it the first time, it may help to go back and read it again to remember the other 6 myths. If you do go read part 1, just click Tlitha Qum at the top to get back here.) :)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"><strong>Myth #7:</strong> <em>If there’s such a thing as a feeding disorder, then why have I never heard of it?</em></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Feeding disorders are much like autism was 50 years ago. It was definitely around, but was not as prevalent as it is today. People didn’t know about it or understand it because it wasn’t talked about, there was little awareness, and not many educators or doctors knew how to help children who had it. These days, every 1 out of 150 children have some type of autism spectrum disorder, and almost everyone knows of someone whose child has it. Most likely in 100 years, feeding disorders will be just as “heard of” as other different needs. Today, 6-35% of children have some type of feeding disorder. It is hard to imagine a baby or child not wanting to eat or struggling to eat. But the rising numbers of books, feeding clinics/programs, and research institutions are a testament to the fact that feeding disorders/aversions do exist and are prevailing.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"><strong>Myth #8:</strong> <em>Kids who don’t like to eat are just picky eaters; a feeding disorder is too serious of a title to give a simple problem like that.</em></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">A feeding disorder is not the same as a picky eater. Even picky eaters eat what they need to maintain weight and get enough nutrition orally. Picky eaters may not like certain types of foods, but they eat large amounts of what they like to eat, which in turn keeps them healthy. Also, the great majority of picky eaters do not have any other underlying medical issues that make eating difficult, frustrating, or painful. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"><strong>Myth #9:</strong> <em>Your baby doesn’t look like he/she is struggling, so it must be made up. Don’t kids who have problems look like something is wrong with them?</em></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">NO! If you walk into any therapy clinic, or a regular classroom, it would be extremely difficult to pick out which children have special needs based on how they look alone. Some special needs are more severe than others. But some medical conditions are not obvious to the outside world. Even adults with some cancers, arthritis, diabetes, fibromyalgia, and other things do not always look unhealthy. Many adults are good at masking their pain or problems; so are children, especially children who have a typical personality and zest for life. In fact, the majority of children who have trouble eating for whatever cause, look like perfectly normal children. Of course, there are children whose special needs do affect their outside appearance, such as muscular dystrophy, cerebral palsy, and Down syndrome. When it comes to feeding, there are varying degrees of these diagnoses as well. I’ve seen children who have only mild Down syndrome who eat perfectly fine, but have trouble doing other things, like jumping rope and learning in school. I’ve seen children who have no mental handicaps, no developmental problems, and are brilliant cognitively, but have oral-motor dysfunction that prevents them from being able to chew, swallow and digest food. Not all children fit into one specific category, nor are all at the same level of disability/difficulty, even in the world of special needs. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The set-back for most people with Stephen is that he has weight on him, and he is always happy. He has gained weight because we weren’t going to let him starve, even if it meant forcing him to drink formula or bottle- feeding him around the clock while he was asleep, which worked until he completely refused and needed a tube. He is happy because we love him, we want his life to be full of joy, and we treat him as though absolutely nothing is wrong.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Now that we’ve gotten past all 9 myths, let’s look at what Kennedy Krieger, which has the #1 Feeding Disorders Clinic/Program/Research Institute in the world, says about feeding disorders:</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">“A child with a feeding disorder does not consume enough food (or liquid, or a broad enough variety of food) to gain weight and grow normally. General feeding difficulties are relatively common among most children. For example, a child may be a picky eater and consume a limited number of foods, but the foods eaten span all the food groups and provide a well-balanced diet. A child with a feeding disorder, on the other hand, may only eat a few foods, completely avoiding entire food groups, textures or liquids necessary for proper development. As a result, children diagnosed with feeding disorders are at greater risk for compromised physical and cognitive development. Children with feeding disorders may also develop slower, experience behavioral problems and even fail to thrive. Severe feeding disorders can cause families and children to feel socially isolated.…</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">There are many different types of feeding disorders, and they can take on one or more of the following forms:</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Trouble accepting and swallowing different food textures</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Throwing tantrums at mealtimes</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Refusing to eat certain food groups</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Refusing to eat any solids or liquids</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Choking, gagging or vomiting when eating</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Oral motor and sensory problems</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Gastrostomy (g-tube) or naso-gastric (ng-tube) dependence</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Feeding disorders typically develop for several reasons, including medical conditions (food allergies), anatomical or structural abnormalities (e.g., cleft palate), and reinforcement of inappropriate behavior (i.e. force feeding). In most cases, no single factor accounts for a child's feeding difficulties. Rather, several factors interact to produce them. While a wide spectrum of factors can contribute to feeding disorders, certain medical and psychological conditions may accompany them:</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Gastrointestinal motility disorders</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Gastroesophageal Reflux Disease (GERD)</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Palate defects</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Failure to thrive</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Prematurity</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Oral-Motor Dysfunction (dysfunctional swallow, dysphagia, oral-motor dysphagia)</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Esophagitis</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Gastritis</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Duodenitis</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Food allergies</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Delayed exposure to a variety of foods</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Behavior management issues </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">• Short Gut Syndrome”</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Feeding (both eating and drinking) is a complex process. When just one little part of the entire process is out of sync, is difficult, is painful, or is delayed, an infant or child can develop a feeding disorder or aversion. If there are other special needs, underlying medical conditions, or disorders going on with the child, it can make eating that much harder.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">For Stephen, we believe everything began when he was born early, causing sensory issues and lack of a desire to consume what he needed to grow; things worsened when he began to reflux so severely that he would choke/gag, aspirate, turn blue-purple, and ended up needing surgery. He felt pain, therefore would only eat while sound asleep, or if we literally poured it down him so that he would gain weight. This snowballed into more sensory problems, which made him refuse to eat altogether, creating a need for a feeding tube. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Dr. Joel Macht, author of the book <em>Poor Eaters</em>, understands children like Stephen extremely well. In an interview with reflux guru Jan Gambino, he writes the following:</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">“I doubt it’s possible to prevent the gamut of problems associated with reflux and other feeding issues. Some food aversion can’t be avoided—some children experience physical discomfort from eating before we realize it, and that discomfort sets the stage for them to begin avoiding what produced the unpleasantness—eating. Likewise, some children, by necessity, are fed argumentatively from their earliest days. Satisfaction from hunger, therefore, occurs without their active participation—they feel better but they have no idea why. Requiring these children to quite suddenly consume food by mouth is often met with closed lips, turned heads, and loud screams. (If that weren’t enough, if a child learns that loud screaming causes a parent to terminate a feeding session, the child will log that lesson for future use. That, by the way, is a behavior issue.) It’s essential, therefore, to feed a child only when he’s hungry. Feeding him (forcing him) when he’s not hungry is asking for all sorts of trouble. Further, it’s quite likely that a day-old-child knows pain and has the capacity to begin avoiding it. It’s critical, therefore, to investigate whether swallowing solids or liquids produces physical discomfort. Infants do learn to turn their heads toward food. It’s just as likely they learn (quickly) to turn their heads away from food. So, find a doc who understands how hunger and pain influence a child’s willingness to eat by mouth. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The poor eater I referred to in [my] book refused food not so much because of preferences, but because he had forgotten, or never learned, that eating by mouth was an enjoyable activity that produced pleasant tastes and reduced the discomfort from hunger. Instead, he had learned that swallowing and eating were painful and frightening, and he had learned adaptive ways to avoid eating. In my judgment, had the poor eater not experienced hospitalization or illness that interfered with a natural eating sequence, had he not, by necessity, been fed by tube, had he not experienced persistent reflux or gagging, had he not come to associate eating with fear and discomfort, he would have happily eaten a taco (or a bowl of cereal) of his own design.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">A final word, not so much about prevention, but about progress. Eating problems take time to develop. Reversing them takes time as well. Eating and feeding have become activities to avoid. If there is a common characteristic that universally crosses this population of chronically refluxing youngsters, it is that eating is rarely a satisfying experience. And because feeding must occur several times a day, every day of every week, frustration, disappointment and, unfortunately, anger are frequent visitors to the experience. Poor eaters and unhappy parents often follow. It takes a good plan, it takes consistency, and it takes patience. Be prepared for that frustrating two steps forward, one step backwards dance. Dig deep and find your optimism. Wear it boldly so your child can feel it.”</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Thanks so much for reading!!! I hope this helps some of you understand more about Stephen’s condition and answers questions you might have. If you have any other questions, would like more information, or have a child with reflux, a feeding disorder, sensory issues, etc... and need someone to talk to, please contact me through my email address on my profile! </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">(All factual information and quotes were taken from PAGER.org, infantrefluxdisease.org, the Kennedy-Krieger Institute for Pediatric Feeding Disorders, and the book <em>Just Take a Bite</em>.) </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-16074771212013416122011-10-01T15:53:00.003-05:002011-10-03T23:01:53.676-05:00our song...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">*<u>UPDATE</u> (10/3/11)*</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Well, we have some pretty crazy news. On Sunday, Stephen had been screaming everytime his diaper was changed; we couldn't figure out why. I reached down to find something hard coming out of his bum. It was a CHUNK of styrofoam from a ball he apparently bit into, then swallowed. I don't know how in the world he was able to pass it. Intestinal blockage = no digestion = constant vomiting. All ER doc had to do was a simple X-ray, and they would have found that. He is doing amazingly better. We are not even sure if he had a stomach bug, as he has not vomited once all day today, not even spit-up!!! Please pray he gains weight back, he lost over a pound total. Thank you SO much to those who were praying!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">*<u>Original Post</u>*</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">We have had a REALLY really rough week. Last Thursday, Stephen started acting like he felt bad, and that night he started throwing up around 2 a.m. or so. I thought maybe it was gas or he was just having a bad reflux day, but it kept happening. By Sunday, he was vomiting ridiculous amounts, more than he's thrown up (not spit-up) since way back in December before his first surgery to stop the reflux. He also started having watery bowls, so we took him to the doctor Monday who confirmed he had a stomach bug and it was going around. He was on nothing but Pedialyte after that. Thinking things were getting better, we stopped the Pedialyte after 24 hours and started back on some formula. The vomiting got worse, until he couldn't keep anything down, not even Pedialyte. Thursday we took him back to the doctor who said it was still just a stomach bug, and he gave us some nausea meds. That day he threw up 7 times, with large puddles of liquid on the floor everytime. :(</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">DH and I were scared sick so yesterday morning (Friday) I called Stephen's Ped. to tell him things weren't getting better, and he was getting ready to go out of town. So, I texted the Nurse Pract. who works with his surgeon at the hospital, and she said take him to the ER asap. At the ER he threw up again (and had already done so once that morning), and they gave him another kind of nausea medicine. They did a blood test, urine test and checked the rest of his body for anything unusual. The labs all came back normal and so they gave him some Pedialyte. He kept an ounce down after the medicine they gave him. They decided to let him go home and for him to stay on nothing but Pedialyte, with getting 1 oz. per hour (talk about exhausting). It has worked, although he has still vomited some. But at least dehydration is no longer a worry. He's lost 8 oz., but I know he'll gain it back! Last night was the first night we both slept all night since last week! </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Please keep praying that the stomach issues go away and that he'll be able to have his formula again soon without anymore vomiting! We had the reflux under control for the most part (except when he's sick), but the vomiting is extremely scary with a reflux kid. He shouldn't even be able to vomit, but the reflux surgery he had to strengthen his esophogus hasn't worked like we thought it would. Over time the stitches usually do loosen, but the food is still supposed to stay down. His surgeon said if there's enough pressure and the child is sick enough, that food is going to come up no matter what you do.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Thank you for praying!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Anyway, this post is titled "the song" and I'll get to that. A few weeks ago, DH bought me the new Mat Kearney CD, which is extremely awesome. While listening to it, one song really stood out to me, called "Sooner or Later." Actually, the lyrics are so awesome, it made me cry, but its a really hopeful and uplifting song. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">So, I decided that this was going to be me and Stephen's song. DH and I have a song, but Stephen and I didn't until now. Everytime I feel worried or want to cry, I put on the CD, and Stephen and I dance. I think he loves it too. :) Here is the song from YouTube so you can listen to it. The lyrics are underneath. Enjoy!</span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/CvChjxIY4XM?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></span></div><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">We’re all standing with our backs against the wall</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Sooner or later</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Waiting on a phone that never calls, at all</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Heartbreak comes, rollin’ in like a storm</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Sooner or later</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Trying to swim but you’re sinking like a stone, alone</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">And I can feel fire in the night waiting here</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Baby it’s like we’re walking on a wire through the fear</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Take my hand, we’ll get there</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Sooner or later, I swear </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">we’re gonna make it, we’re gonna make it,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Sooner or later, I swear </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">we’re gonna make it, we’re gonna make it</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Milk and honey ’til we get our fill</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I’ll keep chasing it, I always will</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Sooner or later, I swear</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">We’ll make it there</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Sooner than later</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">We’re all waiting on a dream that’s hard to own, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">sooner or later</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Trying to feel the high without the low, you know</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">You can feel fire in the night lying here</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Baby it’s like we’re walking on a wire through the fear</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Take my hand, we’ll get there</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The fear inside, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">the hills we’ve climbed</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The tears this side of heaven, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">all these dreams inside of me</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">I swear we're gonna get there</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The fear inside, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">the hills we’ve climbed (sooner or later)</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The tears this side of heaven, </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">all these dreams inside of me</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia;"><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;">I swear we're gonna get there</span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I swear we’re gonna get there</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Sooner or later</span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-49018574077102516672011-09-20T11:31:00.002-05:002011-09-20T15:47:58.100-05:00a mile...<div style="text-align: center;"><u><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">A Mile in My Shoes</span></u></div><div style="text-align: center;"><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">by Me</span></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">What would your life be like,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">If you walked a mile in my shoes?</span></div><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Could you possibly bear the weight,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Of a situation you did not choose?</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">As you hold your precious child</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Knowing he will not eat or drink</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Each day would you say “no big deal”</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Or instead, what would you think?</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">When you hear the doctors’ answers</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Would you yell, cry or be strong?</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Could you handle all the pain</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Of wondering what you did wrong?</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Surgeries and therapies</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Each procedure comes and goes</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">As his mother you feel so alone</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">While battling many foes</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Everyone has an answer</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">And buckets full of advice</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">They say what comes to mind</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Without ever thinking twice</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Their thoughts may be rude and careless</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Their words bring such despair</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">You try to explain to help them see</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">But instead you receive blank stares</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">With all my heart I thank the Lord</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">For those with empathy and compassion</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">God will bless you for your prayers,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">For your love, your gentle reaction</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">No, no one can comprehend</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">What life is like with my son</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">But that’s why God gave him to me</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">And said that I am chosen</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">He knew I’d feel like a failure</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">And question His will for me</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">But still He says “Sara, Stephen is mine,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">And I have set you free.”</span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-74292498994433202572011-09-02T21:39:00.003-05:002011-09-03T13:42:34.198-05:00100 things and a video...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I know it seems like it has been forever since I last wrote on here. We have been so incredibly busy!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Believe it or not, Stephen just celebrated his 1 year birthday!!! We had an awesome party with tons of friends and family. We were hoping he would dig into his cake, and though he didn't eat any, he sure did smash it everywhere! We got some great pics...which I will share next time.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">First, I want to share something I wrote for Stephen and have been working on for a few days. It's called "100 Things I Love About Stephen." I printed it and put it in his baby book for when he is older. I love him SO much, and here are 100 reasons why (though I have 1,000s)!!!</span><br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">100 Things I Love About Stephen:</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">1. His sweet, precious smile</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">2. His infectious laugh</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">3. His great personality</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">4. His toes</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">5. His beautiful blonde-ish hair</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">6. His wake-up-in-the-morning smile (even when he’s sick!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">7. His determination</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">8. His curiosity </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">9. His gorgeous eyes</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">10. His gorgeous eyelashes (women pay money for ones like his!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">11. How cute he looks in his clothes</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">12. His chunky thighs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">13. His little kissable lips</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">14. His adventurous spirit </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">15. How cute he looks when he crawls</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">16. The way he bounces constantly</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">17. When he dances to music</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">18. When he “sings” to music (esp. in the car!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">19. How happy he gets when he hears “Jesus Loves Me”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">20. How he falls asleep in church during the quiet worship times</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">21. When he plays with his Daddy</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">22. His cuddles and affection</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">23. His slobbery “kisses”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">24. His cheeks…so kissable</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">25. When he kicks his little legs when he’s happy</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">26. His mellow attitude</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">27. His button nose</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">28. How he loves Mickey Mouse</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">29. How he loves to “read” a book</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">30. How his face lights up when his Daddy comes home</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">31. The way he snuggles with a blankie</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">32. When he “talks” to his friends (toys, stuffed animals, etc)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">33. When he “talks” to me and Daddy</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">34. The way he says “ma-ma” (he’s starting to recognize it’s me!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">35. How loving he is…he loves everyone he meets</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">36. How he growls when he doesn’t like something/is mad (like a bear-cub!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">37. How he laughs in a new way at different things</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">38. What he does when he gets a new toy</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">39. His puppy dog eyes when he’s sad</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">40. His little pout</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">41. His eyebrows and how he raises them and uses them to communicate!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">42. How much he loves his rocking horse!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">43. How excited he is when he sees a doggie or kitty</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">44. How quickly he learns new things</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">45. The way he “flirts” with girls (ALL girls, haha)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">46. How he always smiles when you take his picture!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">47. When he screams in happiness in the middle of a quiet place/store</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">48. That he loves being outside</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">49. That he loves watching the sun through the window</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">50. How proud of himself he is when he does something</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">51. His flexibility…he can do the splits! Haha</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">52. His love of fishes, the ocean, aquariums (just like Mama)!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">53. That he still loves his doctor and smiles when he sees him, even though he’s been through way too much medical stuff</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">54. His love for drums and banging things to make noise</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">55. How he tries to get my attention if I’m doing something</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">56. Hearing him play in his crib over the monitor</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">57. How he lights up when he sees all of his grandparents</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">58. How he likes to crawl over to you and “wake you up” if you lie on the floor pretending to be asleep</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">59. When he plays peek-a-boo with me</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">60. How he looks when he peeks around a corner</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">61. That he looks adorable when he’s naked</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">62. How excited he gets at bath time</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">63. That he loves getting a massage </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">64. When he digs in my purse and throws everything out (usually at a store)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">65. He thinks it’s funny when people yawn real big</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">66. He makes mean old peoples’ hearts melt (this has happened several times!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">67. When he plays under the covers while snuggling in bed with me and Paul</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">68. That he can be surrounded by a million toys and somehow become fascinated with a small fuzz on the carpet</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">69. When he blows spit bubbles</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">70. When you put him down for a nap and think he’s asleep, only to go in and find him wide awake and sitting up in bed</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">71. His smirk when he knows he’s up to something</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">72. When his hair stands straight up, or we put it in a Mohawk</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">73. His silky baby skin</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">74. His smell, especially after a bath</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">75. He will go any distance for a shoe…the boy LOVES to crawl after shoes!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">76. When he is dreaming </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">77. When he snuggles with his teddy bear Mylo and his stingray Stanley in his sleep</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">78. How he loves to pull the drain and let the water go out while taking a bath, haha</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">79. How he hates the “n” word…No (this is a new thing!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">80. How much he loves to swim in the pool</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">81. How much he loves to swing</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">82. When he picks his feet/legs up so he doesn’t have to stand (he did this at the beach because he didn’t like sand)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">83. How clingy he is when he doesn’t feel good</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">84. His fearlessness when exploring</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">85. When he sucks his toes, and wants you to kiss his toes, lol</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">86. His fake cough, to get your attention</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">87. When he slumps down in his stroller and lets his legs dangle like he is chilling out</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">88. When he is teething and his teeth hurt, he tries to put his teethers in our mouths to make us feel better sweet boy…</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">89. He thinks everyone’s noses are horns…he squeezes them and we say “honk honk” to make him laugh</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">90. His hugs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">91. How he throws everything off the changing table when you change his diaper (including his diaper!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">92. He is not afraid of people and is a social butterfly</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">93. He loves to watch other children play intently</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">94. How funny he thinks we are when we clap and say “yay” after he does something</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">95. How he looks like such a big boy when he sits in a high chair in a restaurant</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">96. He loves to shred paper and it’s hilarious!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">97. He likes typing on the keyboard and usually messes up what I’m doing (and of course I don’t care!)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">98. His “prank” calls to people on my and Paul’s cell phone</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">99. He can un-velcro his diapers while wearing them, take them off, and throw them down, lol</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">100. No matter how bad things seem, he always makes everything better </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;">:)</span><br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-size: large;">Also, you can click here to see a video slideshow I put together of his 1st year (enjoy!):<span style="color: #20124d;"> </span><a href="http://vimeo.com/28274339"><span style="color: #20124d;">http://vimeo.com/28274339</span></a></span></span><br />
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</div>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-87504957448483637452011-08-09T12:26:00.000-05:002011-08-09T12:26:48.496-05:00more prayer for Stephen...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I am still working on the next post for understanding feeding disorders/aversion, but I haven't had too much free time. For now I want to ask for prayer for Stephen. We are fighting double ear infections and it's wreaking havoc on his poor body. For the past 2 weeks he has been miserable, crying/sleeping most of the day and not sleeping much at night. We are on the 3rd round of antibiotics, with our last shot tomorrow. Basically, if we can't get rid of it, he'll end up in the hospital. We've already been asked to think about ear tubes, but DH and I are against that due to him having enough surgeries (3) already. We are asking you to intercede on Stephen's behalf that his body is healed and the infection goes away! God woke me up at 2 a.m. last night and said to read the book of Job, so I did. I'm tired but I know He's up to something. We are hoping for a breakthrough, especially in the realm of eating. Thank you for praying. Please pass this along/share! </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Also, I created a button (on the left side) that you can copy and use on your blog/website, or anywhere else. Just link that button to our page and show others your praying for Stephen! Thanks. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Blessings. +</span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-25319951256139646702011-08-01T11:51:00.004-05:002011-08-01T13:33:39.899-05:00crawling cutie...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I am still working on the next post for understanding feeding disorders/aversions, but in the meantime, I wanted to share a video of Stephen crawling! :)</span><br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/dqjV-QZ8BdQ?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Yay go Stephen! My little crawling cutie.... :)</span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-20290133662929140762011-07-28T11:22:00.007-05:002011-11-03T12:34:14.299-05:00understanding feeding aversion/disorders, part 1...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I've wanted to write this post for awhile, but of course it took time to gather my thoughts and information and put it in a form that would be easy for people to read/comprehend.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><br />
<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">First, I want to shout out loud how BEYOND OVER-JOYED I am about Stephen beginning to crawl (yes, I did say it out loud)!!! Some of you may have not heard, but yep yep, he did it! The first time was in therapy last Friday, by himself. It was wobbly and he didn't go far, but the excitement from his therapist and I was contagious as others walked in to see what was going on. We were literally jumping up and down with happiness!</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><br />
<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I know to most it's not that big of a deal...all babies eventually crawl, right? Yes, they do. But many who crawl late have some sort of developmental delay. Top that off with a baby who has had feeding difficulty since birth, and as a parent, you begin to worry. If it was you, and you had gone through all we have, you'd be concerned too (it drives me nuts when people say not to worry, as if children with different needs don't exist). 12 months is the far end of the normal range for crawling, and going by Stephen's birth age, he is 11 months. Going by his adjusted age, he is 10 months or so. At 6 months, when he couldn't sit up, we weren't too worried. By 9 months, he couldn't keep from falling over while sitting up, still. Lots of people ask us if he's walking yet. When we say, "he's just now crawling," we either get looks of shock or hear "he'll be fine." </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><br />
<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Thanks to all of the research and reading I have done, I know how very, very closely feeding disorders are connected to developmental delay and other underlying problems. Not to mention doctors have told us to our face that feeding problems and developmental problems go hand-in-hand like love and marriage. You would be shocked at the number of children with autism, cerebral palsy, etc... who are on feeding tubes or have been in the past. Needless to say, we have had to keep our eyes open for other possible problems.</span><br />
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<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">So little knowledge is out there about feeding aversions/disorders that most of the time I get blank stares (and an occasional eye roll) when trying to explain why my little angel is on a feeding tube and doesn't want to eat. I still don't have all of the answers, but I feel like I can say I understand a little bit more about my son and his "condition." </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><br />
<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I can also understand why some people think nothing is wrong with Stephen. One look at him and he seems fine. Most people think of a child having special needs as one who <em>looks</em> like he/she has something wrong. I've had one family member say to me "well at least he doesn't have something like down syndrome" (as if that is supposed to help...and even if he DID have that, which he doesn't, I would love him just the same)!!</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><br />
<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">In order to help those of you who can't understand, to understand, I wanted to do a couple of posts about feeding disorders/aversions...what they are, why they exist, what are the causes (if any), and the myths surrounding them. I hope that those in the category of denial or refusal to understand when I explain it in person will read this. I am going to start out with the myths. All of my factual information comes </span><a href="http://www.kennedykrieger.org/kki_diag.jsp?pid=1084"><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #351c75; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The Kennedy-Kreiger Institute</span></a><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"> and also the extremely helpful book </span><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Just-Take-Bite-Effective-Challenges/dp/1932565124/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1311807580&sr=8-1"><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #351c75; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Just Take a Bite</span></a><span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"> recommended to me by Stephen's therapists. The rest of the info comes from having a living, breathing example of the subject. :)</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Here we go:</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong>Myth #1</strong>: <em>Eating is simple. All babies/children have a natural instinct and ability to eat. </em></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The truth about this one is that...well, it just isn't true. It's not very common that a baby is born with no desire to consume what his/her body needs to survive and grow, but it <em>still happens</em>. Or, a baby is born with a desire, but there are other underlying issues at hand that make the process of eating difficult. The majority of the time (and this is a fact based on research) it happens with babies who are taken from the womb when they are not ready and who are born early by C-section. Every feeding therapist we have spoken to can testify to the amount of time they have spent in the NICU trying to feed these little ones. But unnecessary pre-maturity can cause the feeding aversion/disorders also. A doctor may be ready due to convenience, a mother may be ready due to exhaustion and swelling, but if the baby isn't ready to come on it's own, that means he/she is still developing. Some babies do not develop a natural sucking ability/pattern until they are <em>38 weeks</em> along. Doctors these days take babies sooner than that and call them full-term. Full-term is when the <em>baby</em> is ready to come. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Some children have a harder time and special needs that keep them from eating properly. Some have oral-motor dysfunction (like dysphagia, which is difficulty swallowing), some have severe gastrointestinal discomfort (like true acid reflux...not regular spit-up, which is normal), some have cleft palate and cleft lip, some have sensory processing/integration disorder, some have an increased gag reflex (which is sensory-based) and some have all of those or combinations of them. Stephen has several of these factors that contribute to no desire to eat. When eating is hard, or it hurts, or your brain can't process the feeling of hunger, even an infant is going to associate food with being bad.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong>Myth #2</strong>: <em>You are a good parent if your baby is healthy, growing, and looks like a normal baby. It must be something the parent is or isn't doing right if the baby doesn't eat.</em></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The first time I read this one, I sobbed. I still wake up every morning and look in the mirror and tell myself that I love Stephen, and it is not my fault. So many other Moms I have talked to with babies like Stephen or babies with different needs feel this way, and much of it comes from our society's expectations of perfection. We live as though all babies/children are born normal. But they are not. Also, very rarely is it the mother's fault that her baby cannot eat, or if her baby is born with something wrong. Doctors always say it's due to the mother abusing drugs, drinking alcohol, or smoking while pregnant. But out of the Moms I know whose babies have challenges, not a one of them did anything wrong while pregnant. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">It is horrible for someone to blame the parent for a child's medical conditions or expect the parent to fix it. Nor is it wise to pretend that there is nothing wrong with the child if there is. Not all babies (or adults) who have medical conditions actually <em>look</em> sick. But the child may be struggling anyway. Parents of children who don't eat must face this fact every day and cannot live in denial. It is harmful when others who are needed for support do live in denial. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong>Myth #3</strong>: <em>If you just make the baby eat, he'll learn to do it and eventually like it. A baby will not let him/herself go hungry or starve to death.</em></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">"A popular daytime talk show host recently presented his views on 'picky eaters' stating that 'children will eat when they are hungry, and they know how much to eat and when to stop eating.' He went on to say that 'children will not starve themselves.' Finally, he suggested that children who are 'picky' are in a power struggle with their parents and that the parents need to 'win the battle.'" (<em>Just Take a Bite, p. 42</em>)</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Although this type of mentality is common, it is a huge roadblock for children with feeding disorders. In some cases, with babies who are born early, the sucking-breathing-swallowing pattern will develop, the baby will learn to eat, and yes, eventually like it. In rare cases, the baby has a difficult time out-of-womb learning to suck-breathe-swallow in order to eat. Again, there can be underlying problems for this, and the most common are oral-motor dysfunction and sensory disorders. As stated already, forcing it will not work. A baby will learn to distrust the breast, bottle, and food if <em>made</em> to eat. Therapists call it "force feeding." It will cause further oral/feeding aversion and create more problems. This is why Stephen is on a feeding tube. By forcing him to drink from a bottle, we were making things more and more complicated. One day he just shut down and decided he wasn't eating anymore, even if it meant he would starve. This happens with the majority of children with feeding disorders if they are forced to eat. They will shut down and will go hungry if need be.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Lots of people say to us that if he was their child, they would make him eat. Unfortunately, we did that. Force feeding only made the problem worse, and furthered the sensory issues he has as well. It breaks my heart some days knowing we were only exaggerating the problem when he was so little. But we didn't know what was wrong, and I guess as a parent, when it's your responsibility to feed your child and ensure their growth, you have no choice but to do what you can. At least now when I feed Stephen in public, I don't have to force it down him, even if I still get looks that make me believe any moment someone is going to come up and wrap a banner around my shoulders that reads "Worst Mom of the Century...Can't Feed Her Baby."</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong>Myth #4</strong>: <em>Food tastes good and feels good, so all babies and children should enjoy it. </em></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Unfortunately, food doesn't always taste good or make one's tummy feel good. Children with severe gastrointestinal discomfort, food allergies, or inability to feel hunger may be terrified of eating because it does not feel good. Eating is associated with pain of some sort, and the child does not want to eat from fear of the pain.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong>Myth #5</strong>: <em>Children who are "good eaters" are good children. </em></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I have heard this one, and it is just plain mean. Parents, family members, doctors, and anyone else cannot judge the worth of a child based on his or her eating patterns. Our society does this with all children (just sit in a school cafeteria for lunch one day), and when you have a baby with a feeding disorder, it is even worse. The most humiliating thing for us (DH and I) is when we have people we know try to get Stephen to eat table food, although he isn't ready for it (and is barely eating baby food). The looks of disappointment are obvious, and then we feel sad and disappionted as well. It is better to focus on the wonderful accomplishments of children with feeding disorders/aversion, rather than what they cannot or will not do normally (eat).</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc;"><span style="color: #e06666;"><span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"><strong>Myth #6</strong>: <em>Medical conditions that make a child not want to eat can be fixed with medicine or therapy.</em></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">In some cases, yes, medicine and therapy can greatly help. However, it doesn't always work, especially for children who have behavior-based feeding problems (like children with autism). Also, it is not a quick fix. With Stephen, we have determined that his feeding disorder is directly associated with his sensory disorder, and though sensory problems can be overcome, it may take a long time. We have to re-program his nervous system that was jolted from birth, to help him not be afraid of food, to help him realize it won't hurt, and to help him feel a desire to eat again. When Stephen stopped eating altogether, we did not understand that a 4-week feeding program would not fix the problem because we did not know the depth of the problem we were facing. We also do not know why all of the acid reflux medicines, along with surgery, did not correct the gastrointestinal problems, though they have helped a great deal. Finally, we still don't have all of the answers and may not have them until Stephen is older.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Well, before this post gets WAY too long and overwhelming, I am going to stop there and continue in part 2. I really appreciate those of you who took the time to read this, and I hope it helps some of you have a better understanding of what feeding disorders are. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Until next time...</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Blessings!!</span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-19626912959492308512011-07-14T12:05:00.000-05:002011-07-14T12:05:42.722-05:00beach baby...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I don't have too much time to elaborate on our wonderful Florida trip, but I just HAVE to share some pictures of someone super adorable. He had a ball at the beach. It was SO much fun. And super cheap, thanks to free military passes for everything, and wonderful family members! We did have one scary thing happen, but this isn't a post about that. ;) I will tell more later! Enjoy the pics!!</span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-XoU4aT-ghg8/Th8gEMVBy4I/AAAAAAAAAuk/tpr58VrZ5gA/s1600/DSC03047.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="312" m$="true" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-XoU4aT-ghg8/Th8gEMVBy4I/AAAAAAAAAuk/tpr58VrZ5gA/s320/DSC03047.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-70624600000291448412011-06-28T11:53:00.004-05:002011-06-28T16:58:58.635-05:00fathers, miracles, beaches and blogs...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Well, where do I begin...there has been so much going on, and I am WAY overdue on an update. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The main reason I am so behind on blogging lately is I have been a soap-making machine, haha! This, along with attending to Stephen 24/7 (my real full-time job ;) and taking care of our home, has left me completely exhausted at the end of the day most days!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Here is just a tiny sneak peak at my soaps...these bars are Lavender Vanilla. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">DH and my mother both said that it smells so good they could eat it. There's real dried French Lavender buds, ground Madagascar vanilla beans, and raw organic sugar to give it some extra sweetness. It won't be ready to go yet for several more weeks, as all soap has to "cure" in order to let the lye cook out and be safe to use on your skin!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Father's Day was really, really nice. Stephen was feeling fantastic and had several surprises for Daddy. :) I found a precious card that was able to record voices, and after 1500 tries, I recorded Stephen laughing on it for DH. He LOVED it. We also picked out some nice shirts for him. But his big gift was a hammock. He'd been wanting one for awhile, and I found one that was very inexpensive at a great store here that has outdoor things that are discounted! </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">We experienced nothing short of what I'd call a miracle on Father's Day as well. During church, Stephen started babbling and making consanant sounds, for the first time, while the preacher was giving his sermon! He said "ba-ba-ba" and "ma-ma-ma" and we were stunned. Then he never stopped!! He has been saying it constantly since that day. DH said it was by far the best Father's Day gift he could have received. Before he was only laughing and squealing. At 9 months, almost 10, we were concerned about him not doing this. But not anymore! Praise GOD for what He did!!! We are thrilled! Hearing him "talk" every day is like beautiful music to our ears.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">DH's parents came for the day as well, and I cooked a yummy dinner of Oven-Baked B-B-Q Chicken, Baked Sweet Potatoes, Macaroni Salad, and Lemon Blueberry Pudding Cake for dessert (I was going to make another chicken dish, but changed my mind, haha). It all turned out really good!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The next day Stephen started acting like he wasn't feeling good, again (ugh). I always know something is up if he (1) doesn't sleep well at night, (2) sleeps better during the day, (3) doesn't want to play, and (4) just looks like he feels bad. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Sure enough, I took him to the doctor that Tuesday and he had another ear infection (gggrrrrrr) and hand-food-mouth disease, which can cause ulcers in the throat/mouth and a nasty rash on hands/feet. He never got the rash on his hands/feet, but he did on his bum and other private areas. It was awful looking...think yeast diaper rash x 10. He was miserable. :( We were pooped from lack of sleep! Finally the rash went away, and at our check-up yesterday his throat was almost clear. The ear infection seems to be better too! Thank the Lord.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Another reason I have been busy this week is packing. DH and I made the decision to take a vacation this summer, during 4th of July. We are driving to Florida for a week and staying with his brother and sister-in-law who live there! We really prayed about it seriously because (1) Stephen is still little and has the medical issues and (2) we don't have much money right now from paying medical bills. However, we had set aside emergency money from our income tax return in case we needed it, seperate from Stephen's donation money in savings, and then Paul was paid extra from his 2-week AT drill. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">We really debated over using the money from income tax and drill for other things, but after all we've been through, we thought the beach would be really great for all of us. Plus seeing family will be really good! We are super excited and really thanking God we get to go. We leave this Thursday so this will be my last update until we get back next week!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Just for your viewing pleasure, here are some recent pictures of the little guy. I love his eyes in these pictures. He woke up from a nap and was being super cute. We played peek-a-boo with the blankie. :)</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Finally, a friend commented on my blog and shared a link to another person's blog that I have really loved reading lately. She has some beautiful things to say about the Lord and about being a mother, and her blog is not the typical mommy-type blog either. She is humble and talks about adoption alot too. One of her latest blog-posts is titled "Parenting on Your Knees." If you're a parent, you should really read this one. Just <a href="http://www.meghmiller.com/parenting-on-your-knees/"><strong><span style="color: #351c75;">click here</span></strong></a>. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Thanks for reading, and thank you for the encouraging comments you left me on the last post. Thanks for continuing to pray for Stephen also! Oh, and happy 4th of July! :) </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Blessings from the Fleming Family +</span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1837396366336936707.post-80703792900954060072011-06-17T18:46:00.004-05:002011-06-18T12:10:03.933-05:00judging hurting people...<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Disclaimer: There are a bunch of you who will read this post and get really mad...I hope more of you get convicted instead.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I've been wanting to write this for awhile now but haven't yet because, well, I haven't thought it was time until now.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">There is something seriously wrong with Christians who find no problem in judging others who are hurting and/or grieving. Since Stephen was born 9 months ago, I have experienced this many times. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I have flat out been told to my face that my faith in God is fake because I have hurt/grieved over the pain and struggle my son has gone through with his medical issues. I've been told that because I've been angry, scared, lonely, etc... that my love for God is not strong enough, that I've walked away from Him, that I must not be saved, or whatever else. In one of the darkest times in my life, I've been made to feel guilty by other Christians for feeling pain or struggling. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Since when did Christians stop going through the grieving process? Since when did we lose our humanity just because we are going to heaven one day?? </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">There is something wrong with us as believers if we can look at hurting people and think we are better than them or that our faith in God is stronger because we haven't grieved like they have or haven't been through what they have. We really ought to walk a mile in another person's shoes before deciding that they don't know Jesus if they are struggling.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I'm not sure what has been taught in the world of Christianity these days as far as this topic goes, but I know I am guilty of it...and SHAME on me. Shame on me for taking anyone's heartache and making light of it. Shame on me for looking at someone who has lost a loved one, lost a child, lost a dog and deciding that their hurt isn't real. Shame on me for seeing a woman in a marriage that is in shambles and instead of offering to help her, offering to come and sit with her while she cries, judging her instead and deciding that her faith isn't strong enough because she and her husband are going through the fire. Shame on me if I've seen a homeless man who has been through unimaginable heartache and decided that its his own fault he's homeless. Shame, shame, <em>shame</em> on me for judging anyone who has gone through any sort of difficult time. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Shame on <em>you</em>, also, if you have done this.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">To those Christians who have made me feel like dirt for going through the grieving process or for questioning my faith in God, shame on you.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">To those Christians who told me that if I prayed more, maybe then my son would be healed, shame on you.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">To those Christians who saw me and my husband hurting, in need of friendship and love rather than condemnation and judgement, and ignored us, talked badly about us, and pretended we don't exist, shame on you.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I love you and I forgive you.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">Every single person on this planet, whether they know the Lord or not, has gone through or will go through some type of hurt or pain in their lifetime. You may not have been there yet, but most likely you will. If you live an entire life that is easy, you need to wonder at the end what happened. It is inevitable for humans to experience hurt of some sort, and probably more so for those who have denied themselves, taken up their cross, and followed Jesus. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">But just because we know Christ and have the Holy Spirit doesn't mean we have suddenly become a god ourselves. We are not Christian robots. We still feel things, still struggle, and still have times where our faith isn't perfect. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">And everyone who has lost something or someone they loved, or has been through something difficult, has gone through the grieving process. Stephen is here, but I have grieved deeply over the "loss" I have felt of him having a normal baby-hood. Grief is our human response to heartache, regardless of what we believe. Some people (those who are dubbed the "strong Christians") get through this process quicker than others. Some Christians take years to get from one step to the next. The grieving process is part of the healing process, and people who are hurting need healing, not a "get-fixed-quick" solution to what they are going through. Here are the steps:</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">1) Denial/Shock</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">2) Anger</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">3) Bargaining</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">4) Guilt/Depression</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">5) Loneliness</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">6) Acceptance</span><br />
<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">7) Resolution/Re-adjusment</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">The next time you know a Christian who is experiencing deep heartache or pain, or is experiencing a loss of some sort, don't just shove Scripture in their face and tell them to let it go and give it to God. Instead, give them time to grieve. Don't offer advice about how to get over the pain. Cry <em>with</em> them. Offer to do something for them. Buy them a cup of coffee or some beautiful flowers, just to show that you care. Chances are, when they are ready to talk, they will come to you as a friend. They won't be afraid of being rejected by you if they are still struggling. They won't think you are judging them if they still don't have it all together. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">I am so happy I can say that I am finally in the last stages of the grieving process over my son's struggle. I have accepted, and am continuing to accept the baby he is and am adjusting to my new life as his Mom. I have also resolved the idea that this may be something I have to deal with for a long time and am okay with that. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">And, thanks to the few people who have helped me through this time so far, I have not walked away from my relationship with Christ, and every day I lean on Him for strength, courage, hope, and even joy.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: #fff2cc; color: #e06666; font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;">(To see more on this topic, to understand grief, and to know how to be there for others who are hurting, go here: <a href="http://www.focusonthefamily.com/lifechallenges/emotional_health/coping_with_death_and_grief/helping_loved_ones_grieve.aspx">http://www.focusonthefamily.com/lifechallenges/emotional_health/coping_with_death_and_grief/helping_loved_ones_grieve.aspx</a></span>Sara Fleminghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17448877274699623623noreply@blogger.com4